I’ve talked before about how I use games in my children’s church. Almost without exception they work double duty as fun and an object lesson. This means that I create the games right along with the rest of my service and then share that information with the volunteer leading the game.

I wanted to share the format that I write up the games. The format really seems to help me to explain the game properly and keeps the typical barrage of questions and explanations to a minimum. It also helps the volunteer to remember that the game is more than just a game… it’s a teaching tool.

I divide each game into four simple segments:

Props

Most games need props. Basketballs, hula-hoops, chapsticks, cotton balls and plastic forks. I always start my list with the props because without them the game isn’t possible. It helps me to remember to pick up any items I need during the week. It also tells my game leader the first things they need to look for when they head backstage where their props are already sitting out.

Prep

This is where I layout the setup of the game. Two baskets on one side. Two lines of 3 kids (six total) with balls of paper on the other. If there are props that need to be opened, unwrapped, sorted or put into containers this is where I write it up. Ninety percent of frustration alleviation is preparation.

Play

Here is where I punch out exactly how the game is played. The children have sixty seconds to see how high they can stack Lego blocks without them falling over. Is it a timed game or a relay race? If something falls out or over, can they start from there or do they go back to the beginning? Be sure to describe the goal that the children are going for. Include how many points should be given for 1st or 2nd place.

Say

This is the part that ties the game into the lesson. Often I’ll have my leaders give a small intro that helps kids make the link in advance. “Today we’re talking about God loving the world… so we’re going to play a quick game using Hershey Kisses!” Then after the game I’ll have them follow up with a bit more explanation… similar to a teacher explaining an object lesson. “In our game we tried to get as many Hershey Kisses in the box as possible. We worked hard! God wants us to make sure to share as much of His love as possible with the world too!” You get the idea.

I write up each game in my service notes the same way. Here’s an example:

• Props: 2 scooters, 2 rolled newspapers
• Prep: The newspapers are going to serve as “batons” for the players to pass off in the relay. Choose six kids (one from each team) to form two teams. Line them up relay-style.
• Play: Kids will roll their scooter around the congregation holding the newspaper. The first team to have all of their participants down and back wins!
• Say: “Just like the paperboy has to deliver the news to everyone on his route, we as Christians are to share our faith with everyone we meet. It’s not someone elses job. It’s OUR job to start spreading the news! We must SOW wherever we GO!

(Game taken from Brian Dollar’s “High Voltage” children’s church curriculum.)

How do you do games? Share your thoughts and suggestions in the comments.

Ten years go there was a movement among Children’s ministers to educate children and parents about the horrors of a cartoon-card game-toy combo called Pokémon. Many a children’s service was sprinkled references to these “pocket monsters” and how the game would act as a gateway to other games such as Magic: The Gathering and Dungeons and Dragons. The way some of my peers went on and on about it you’d think Pokémon was more of a threat to their children’s salvation than Satan himself.

So now all those children have grown up. Pokémon fever has subsided. What has become of those who just had to catch them all? Did they fall prey to the gateway of card gaming and delve deeper into the devil’s grasp?

No they didn’t. Kids who played Pokémon during it’s height are now in college or starting a career and a family. The internet is full of these now young adults and guess what. The worst that happened is that some of them still play Pokémon. Others create comics that riff on their former dedication or the vulnerabilities of certain characters or even issues with gameplay in general. Still others craft plushies or create song remixes using their talents and skills. The same way my generation pays homage to Star Wars, The Smurfs, Transformers, Scooby Doo or He-Man.

We were wrong about Pokémon.

It didn’t lead anyone any further away from God than they already were. That goes for Christian and non-Christian kids alike. And I’ve had the privilege of watching children in both groups grow up. It was a fad. A game and a TV Show. And now a part of pop culture. Nothing more.

Why does this matter?

Why write a post about it? Because back in my day, in my childhood, churches and Christian parents were up to the same thing. He-Man, The Smurfs, Transformers, Scooby-Doo… all marked as evil. At times I heard more about what I wasn’t allowed to do than anything else. So between the evils of pop culture, catching the tail-end of the backward masking craze and the church’s fixation on demons in the 80’s it’s a wonder I learned about the love of God at all.

It matters because we still play this game today.

Anything that comes out that becomes popular is demonized by church folks. Did Teletubbies send any toddlers to hell? Or even worse convert them to homosexuality? No. Has Harry Potter interested thousands of kids in witchcraft and created a demand for warding schools across the country? No. Has Sponge Bob Squarepants tempted a generation of helpless children to live in a pineapple under the sea? No.

People (kids included) don’t go to hell because of what they watch, collect, play or enjoy. The only reason a person goes to hell is if they do not have a living relationship with Jesus Christ the Son of God. Time is precious. There is so very little of it. Every moment we spend preaching against something is a moment we’re not directing kids toward God. It’s actually a moment we’re spending making kids think that God is against everything fun, creative and popular.

That’s why I don’t preach against pop culture. I share the love of Christ and try to illustrate how that love affects the lives of those who return that love through obedience. My job is not to be the Holy Spirit for my kids and their families. That’s the Holy Spirit’s job. And if the parents don’t care, or aren’t involved… well those kids have bigger troubles than what they’re watching on TV and they need to know God cares more than what we believe he frowns on.

I understand the intentions of those who demonize pop culture. Their goal is to protect children. I have children of my own. They’re not allowed to watch everything that’s out there. But I understand that if they grow up to be horrible people, it won’t be because of what they watched, collected or traded with friends. It will be because I didn’t display how a living relationship with God affects a life, a marriage, a family, a ministry and the world. This is a call to all parents and children’s ministers. Let’s focus less on the things of this world and more on the things of God. Let’s be a church that stands for something rather than against something.

“The things of this world grow strangly dim in the light of His Glory and Grace.”

I welcome your thoughts and comments.

In part one of of this series we discussed how Children’s Pastors and their ministries can be easily disrespected and how it is our responsibility to earn the respect of our church. Part two suggested several ways we can gain respect for our children’s ministries. This third and final part will focus on a some things you can do to gain respect as a minister yourself.

Let’s recall that in previous posts we came to the conclusion that respect is earned not owed. It’s not automatic. Many children’s ministers get so focused on the intensity of their work that they forget about some of the basics. And those basics are keeping folks at bay.

I find myself comparing a children’s ministry to a cake. A basic cake has two parts. Cake and icing. Some children’s ministries are all icing. They look great on the outside, but they’re empty inside and have nothing beyond the technology and hype. Other children’s ministries are the cake without the icing. They’re not much to look at… but they’re actively loving and training kids and families to be more Christ-like. Though I respect “cake” ministries over “icing” ministries it’s important that your “cake” ministry has a little “icing” too. There are things you can do to dress-up the image of your ministry and yourself as a minister that will make what you do more attractive to those who are outside and may not understand how much work you put into your “cake”.

Dress to impress

In the business world they say, “Don’t dress for the job you have. Dress for the job you want.” Well we already have the job we want so it doesn’t apply to our situation 100% but it allows me to make a point. Dress for the respect you want, not for the respect you have… or for comfort.

I still struggle with this one myself. I’m not the skinny hip guy with a printed collared shirt that seems to be populating much of children’s ministry these days. I don’t fit in hipster clothes (read: athletic fit). I want to minister in comfort. I also do a lot of “running” on Sundays and I get sweaty. I want to minister is something that breaths. I also get lots of hugs from kids who transfer God only knows what from their faces to my clothing. I want to minister in something that I don’t have to dry-clean every single week. I’m comfortable in nice jeans or kakis and a button up collared shirt… but I don’t look much like a pastor. I probably need to be wearing a suit each week regardless of my own comfort or fear of cleaning bills.

Go to Big Church

You need to be in big church at least once a month. You need to be on stage doing something as well. Open with prayer, take the offering, do the announcements. Get your face up there where people are used to seeing the “real” pastors. People will begin to feel they know you.

You also need to be ministered to by your pastor. I recently moved my monthly Sunday because I had chosen a week pastor typically puts guest speakers in. Nothing against them, I want to hear the heart of my own pastor. How else can I stay connected to what God is doing in my church if I’m not even a regularly attending member. Plus, I get to sit with my smoking-hot wife on the front row.

Get involved

After all that children’s ministers do in a week it’s typically impossible to imagine doing anything else associated with the church. After all, why should I go to the homeless feeding or help with the all-church clean-up day? No one’s going out of their way to help me. Well, maybe I know why now.

You have to sew what you want to reap. You’ve got to become an involved and helpful person in order to attract involved and helpful people. Plus, it’s just one more chance to let people see your dedication, not just to your own ministry, but to the church as a whole. So join Men’s or Women’s ministry (that’s what God made me do). Work the hardest on the church work day. Go see the church play, even if it stinks.

Address Parents

Sometimes children’s pastors find that their confidence in speaking leaves them when they’re not talking to children. When a family would pass me in the hallway, for instance, I would address the children and only give a glancing hello (if that) to the parents. This made me look very socially challenged I’m sure. Sure I’m more comfortable talking to children, but I’m not afraid of adults. I am one, and so are you.

We’ve got to realize that we’re not really a Children’s Pastor. We’re a Pastor who works with Children. My pastor understands this. That’s why my official title at the church is Associate Pastor of Children. So I’m not just the children’s pastor, I’m one of the parent’s pastors too. I greet the parents first, then their children. It’s more respectful and it puts you on level with the other associate pastors. Plus, I’ve found that often times I get the same excited look in a parent’s eyes when they see me as I’m accustomed to seeing in their children. It’s a good thing to see.

I hope this article series has been of help to you. I’d love to get your comments and feedback especially if you put any of these suggestions into practice. God bless.

This episode I’d like to share a sermon I did for big church last year. I hope the message ministers to you.

In my first post in this series I talked about the secret issue of many children’s ministers: disrespect. I suggest you head over and read that post before continuing.

It’s important for us to remember that we are a support ministry, we’re not part of the big show, and on our best day will still be playing second fiddle. That position is not a punishment, it’s our God-given position. We can bloom there or become bitter, brittle and dry.

Which of us haven’t been asked when we’re planning to become real pastors? Or, “What do you do all week?” or my favorite, “I can tell why you work with kids, you’re just a big kid yourself!” These things aren’t just annoying or offensive, they’re a window into the viewpoint of our congregation, and ultimately a hindrance to the growth and development of our ministry. In other words, it’s easer to do ministry that people understand and respect.

There are several things we can do to improve the way our ministry as a whole is perceived in our own churches.

Run an excellent program

Excellence has nothing to do with budget, volunteers, children’s ministry spaces or support. Excellence is doing the most you can with what you have. So many children’s ministers play the “if only” game. We decide that there are things we could do “if only” we had the resources we needed (human, financial, building, etc.) In reality that’s not dreaming big, or shooting for excellence. It’s a poor (no pun intended) excuse for not doing what God has called you to do. He’s put you where you are. In the Parable of the Talents, each man was given a different amount to work with. Many of us feel like the third guy who got the least. We know how the story ends… but imagine if that third man had taken the little he had an used it to the best of his ability. I believe that he would have been rewarded above all the others for his faithfulness and resourcefulness. The last shall be first and all that.

Remember what God says about those who are faithful over little… they’ll be made master over much. He loves it when folks make miracles happen in tight spaces. So do people. We’re all inspired by stories of folks who make lemonade out of lemons so to speak. Disappointment tells God that we’re not thankful for what He has provided. So even if you have nothing, do your best with it. People will see your good deeds and praise your Father in Heaven. They might also want to help you out.

Enforce policy

For some reason people think the rules are different at church. They’ll obey the policies of the private school they send their child to, but they’ll try to stomp all over yours. Some of your volunteers may also have a careless attitude toward your policies, expectations and standards. When we let things slide or try to keep the peace in the moment, we lose. If your policies are correct and you believe in them, you should enforce them. It’s not easy or fun, but rules that aren’t enforced aren’t respected. And by connection, your ministry will be thought of as lax and unsafe.

Keep areas and storage clean

Sometimes it’s the little things that matter… and when your pastor or co-workers see your storage spaces or your backstage area, they make a judgment about your entire ministry. Parents do the same thing when they look inside their child’s classroom. If it’s messy, dark, out-of-date, or God-forbid, dirty, you’re just asking folks to not take your ministry seriously.

Children’s ministry comes with a ton of “stuff”. And I understand not wanting to get rid of it all. My theory is that a children’s ministers closet will never be clean, but it can be organized. Like a can of sardines… the contents may be nasty, but man they’re sure stacked in there nice. Keep your stuff put away. Keep the floor clear. Keep your backstage area organized and vacuumed. Go through everything twice a year and clean house. Three piles: keep, give and trash. In your classrooms decorations should be changed quarterly (with curriculum changes). Closets and cabinets should be cleaned twice a year. Trash emptied after each class.

They say that cleanliness is next go Godliness… and in the case of your areas, I would agree completely.

Next Post

In the next post I’ll address several other things we can do personally to improve our “image” and the level of respect you will earn.

What are some of the things you would suggest to raise the respect level of your entire ministry? Leave your suggestions in the comments.

There is a secret issue just under the surface in the ministry lives of many children’s ministers. The issue is the feeling of a lack of respect from others about what we do. We work with children and are separated from the main service. It’s easy for us to feel removed, forgotten, taken for granted and disrespected.

We can feel disrespected by our leaders and fellow pastoral staff as we sit through staff meetings listening to conversations about a service we weren’t a part of. We can feel disrespected by other ministries when our equipment is thrown aside when our room is used for other purposes. We can feel disrespected by parents when they want to side-step check-out procedures and pick-up their child how and out whichever door they want. Even our own volunteers can unintentionally make us feel disrespected when they are consistently late or call in sick at 9:30pm Saturday night.

Though as a whole the Church has come a long way in realizing the validity of ministry to children and families, she still has a long way to go. And who cares about the Church as a whole if your church happens to be functioning a few years behind the curve. There are still plenty of churches and plenty of pastors that do take children’s ministry for granted. It’s a reality for many of us. My point? All of your feelings about being disrespected may be right!

As a minister you should be respected… at minimum you should not be disrespected. But there is a hard truth: If you’re not a part of the “big-show” on Sunday morning, what you do will generally not be regarded as equal or as important. Even in the perfect and ideal church, this will always to some extent be the case.

So what now? Do we quit? Do we try not to care? Do we buckle down and claim that we’re doing it for the Lord and the kids anyhow? Do we convince ourselves that it’s prideful to want equal treatment and attention after all? Or do we start to get bitter and demanding? Spiteful of our peers and leaders? Neither direction is beneficial or acceptable.

This article is the first in a short series so I’m not going to try to address and answer everything at once. My goal with this first post is to validate your feelings. To let you know that others out there have felt it… and how some of us are dealing with it. But I will say this…

We’re a support ministry… not the main ministry.

I like what I’ve heard Jim Wideman say. He says he doesn’t see the title “Children’s Pastor” in the bible… so he figures it falls under the “Pastor” category. He’s saying that without the head Pastor there is no Children’s Pastor or children’s ministry. Without the “big-show” there is no “little-show”. We are there to serve and support our Pastor and the parents of our churches… even if they never know how much we do for them. Secondly…

Respect is earned.

Respect isn’t given, it’s earned. Sometimes we children’s ministers forget that. We think that we’re owed special treatment because of the things we endure. The reality is that we do a job that very few do understand. Most folks are scared to death of children (though I’ve never understood that) or think of them as dirty, bratty, needy ragamuffins (I do understand this one). To many our job falls somewhere between the folks who hand out bulletins and the folks who clean the toilets. So it falls on us to earn the respect that we do indeed deserve. Not because we’re prideful but because respect in ministry results in ministry that’s easier to do, and easier to attract others to do with you. One more…

Not everyone shares your vision, nor should they.

Just accept it. No one on the earth is going to have the same passion or vision for the ministry God has given you like you do. Not even your own pastor. Example: Do you have a vision for my ministry? No? Well I don’t really have one for yours either. Same goes for the choir at your church. They don’t really have a vision for your kids. Even your parents… they have a vision but it’s for one or two kids (theirs) not the whole group of them. Everyone has their own calling and passion and you have yours. Don’t be bitter about it, relish it. It’s yours. God gave it to you.

Next post we’ll talk about how to go about being a ministry (and minister) who earns proper respect. In the mean time I would love to get your feedback! If any of this has rung true, let me know in the comments. Even if it’s just a simple, “Amen!”

I hate resolutions as a concept. Mostly because I associate the word with something I will almost instantly not accomplish as soon as possible. I prefer setting goals. Where resolutions demand perfection from the moment you make them, goals only demand a first step in the right direction. Goals don’t mind if you struggle to reach them. Resolutions mock you the moment you stray.

Speaking of goals, these are the three that God is pressing on me this year. Maybe you’ll find that He’s calling you to something similar.

1. Deepen Your Connection With God

I think ministers struggle with this more than they care to admit. Our lives are spent serving God, studying the Bible, thinking about His will. But how many times are we actually just doing our job, reading enough scripture to create a sermon, and praying just enough to get by. My goal this year is to stop treating God as a power source (though he is that and thank God he is) and get to know Him as the God that knew me before ministry. The God who loved James when there was nothing to love. I need to connect with God even when I don’t need to connect. Does that make sense?

2. Connect With Your Church

I’ve been at my new position for 2 years (last November) and though I totally love my church, my leadership, my ministry and fellow ministers… I don’t get to spend a lot of time mixing and mingling with my fellow church people. I only get one Sunday a month to visit “big church” and regular Sundays most folks have left by the time I’m free. It’s easy for folks who work in Children’s Ministry to get disconnected from the rest of the church (and I theorize that some of us actually like Children’s Ministry for that reason), but this year I’m going to work hard to reverse that trend in my life. The extra church events that aren’t mine, I need to go! Regular Sundays? I need to find a way to be able to greet my parents and others before they slip out of the door. I need to be on a first name basis with folks who have no connection to my ministry at all. I need to see people in my church outside of the context of “how can I use them” and more like “how can I matter to them”.

3. Connect With Your Families

Speaking of mattering. I really want to matter to families this year. When a child struggles with math, parents contact the teacher for help and support. I want to be the pastor my parent’s call when their child is struggling spiritually. We become that kind of pastor when we open communication channels, show that we care and prove that we’re worthy of trust. It also helps if people see our own children are well behaved and spiritually balanced. I have good kids, I care about the families in my ministry, I just need to work harder on proving myself and opening the access doors via relationships and communication.

Do any of these goals challenge you? What goals are God challenging you with? Leave your comments below. You pray for me and I’ll pray for you!

We’ve been using Parent Pager for about two years now and things are going great. The only exception is the way this system is presented each week. From day one I’ve had the computer, label printer, laser printer and finger scanner sitting on 4 foot plastic tables covered with a cloth. This means my top-of-the-line check-in system looks like it’s on display at a yard sale. It’s time to change that.

I’ve seen other churches with nice check in stations with helpful attendants behind the counter ready to help. My church really isn’t set up for a full on Welcome Center style area. I’m dealing with hallways here. I needed some sharp looking kiosks for my check-in computers.

Have you priced these things? I can save you the trouble… they’re way out of our price range ($600-$1000+). And that’s only if you’re looking for a stock solution. If you need anything custom built the prices just go up from there. So I’m building my own check-in kiosks.

With some MDF, 2×2′s, drywall screws and some laminate I’m going to make my own check-in kiosks. They’re not the fanciest things out there… but they meet my needs. And once I’m done I’m going to post my blueprints (plans) here so your church handyman can build you some.

Pictures and more after the jump.

First I worked up a 3d rendering of the kiosk in Google Sketchup. I had a good idea of what I wanted after looking online at some of the kiosks available. I had also measured all of my check-in components to make sure my shelves where tall and deep enough.

After the first day of collecting materials and cutting the first few boards to size… I had this to show.

Day two was spent drawing out, cutting and shaping the front panel as well as picking up additional materials and learning how to laminate by watching videos on YouTube. Attached the front panel and installed the shelves using brass pegs that were pushed into 1/4″ holes. That way I can adjust them later if I need too.

On day three I had a lot of other things pulling me away from the garage, but I was still able to put my laminating learning into practice for the first time. I felt like it went pretty well. Then two coats of black satin paint over the whole thing.

Day four I painted in re-installed the shelves and laminated the edges of the front panel (inside and out). Ran out and got some cheap peg-board like material, cut it, painted it, and nailed it to the back. Then I used my drill to knock out some holes in the back panel for the wires and cords. Done!

Tomorrow I’ll take it to the church and set it up to make sure everything works properly before I build the other three.

So what do you think? I think it looks a little like a cross between Epcot’s 80′s take on the future and an iPhone. Would something like this work for your church check-in needs? Let me know in the comments.

** Update **

Here’s the kiosk set up and in place at the church. I should have taken a “before” picture to show you how much space this thing is saving.

I plan to have the Suncoast Kids logo printed on vinyl and added to the bottom. It’ll really finish it off nicely.

“The Birthday Story” is the Nativity Christmas Story told from the perspective of Mary from Mother to Son.

Slides and story are available for a $10 donation.

When we Children’s Pastors think about school outreach we tend to focus on the ever closing door of public school. I have found that local Christian Schools and even Daycares are looking for ministers and volunteers to help in their weekly chapel services.

I never considered a Christian school to be much of a harvest field… But I was wrong. There are quite a few families who send their children to Christian schools because they can, not because of any kind of Christian faith or values. You’ll also find a segment of children there who just couldn’t make it in public school due to behavior or emotional disorders. The need is great and the doors are often wide open.

Most schools require a background screening. The schools I work with require a level 2 background check which includes fingerprinting. I also had to have a volunteer badge made with a photo. This allows me on campus to do two chapels for elementary students per month and one for the pre-schoolers per month. They’d let me do it weekly at the preschool if my schedule allowed,

To get started head over to Google Maps and search for Christian schools in your area and give them a call. I can almost guarantee they’re looking for chapel speakers. Even if the school is run by a church.

The benefits? Every child on campus knows me. Parents know me by default which gives me an instant “in” while on campus. I’ve been able to help with “See You At The Pole” events and graduation ceremonies. We also have more than a few families who attend here as a result. The schools are more than happy to return the favor by promoting any of my special events to the kids. I’ve even been asked by the Art Teacher to come share some of my artworks with the kids over a period of several visits this year.

Those of you with successful public school outreaches… Press on! But for those of us who are looking for more ways to reach into the community… Consider your local Christian school. There may be a harvest there ripe for the picking.

Do you have experience in working with local schools, Christian or otherwise? Share your tips and thoughts in the comments,

What Bible version is best to use when kids are involved? We typically use Bibles with children in one of three contexts: general or devotional reading, scripture memorization and in ministry to children.

Devotional Reading

For general devotional reading some folks default to the New International Version (NIV) for children. They may not realize that the reading level for the NIV is 7th-8th grade. This means that a majority of our elementary aged children will not be able to read the NIV with ease or with comprehension.

Memorization

I think the NIV or KJV is fine for scripture memorization. The New International Version is popular and will be compatible with other uses later in life. The King James Version is popular as well, but the reading level for the KJV is 12th grade!

Children’s Ministry

For preaching I typically use the Contemporary English Version (CEV). It is easy to read and understand for a majority of elementary school aged children. The Contemporary English Version targets a 3rd grade reading level. This is also the Bible I suggest when parents ask me for a version that will work well for their children.

I know a lot of children’s pastors like The Message for the same reason… but The Message is a paraphrase, not a translation. Also The Message, though written well, contains abstract concepts and metaphors that are not as easily grasped by children. Even though The Message is at a 4th grade reading level, the readability of the words themselves does not necessarily translate into simple comprehension for the child reading.

For devotional reading and preaching to children I suggest the following Bible versions:

• Contemporary English Version (CEV) 3rd Grade Reading Level
• Everyday Reading Bible (ERV) 3rd Grade Reading Level
• New International Readers Version (NIrV) 3rd Grade Reading Level

As a bonus, these versions also double as great Bibles for folks who are learning English as a second language (ESL Students). You can sample all of these versions at www.biblegateway.com.

What Bible version do you use when reading or preaching to your kids?

We have a listener who’s looking for English and Spanish curriculum that is in sync with one another. She currently uses Gospel Publishing House curriculum, but she’s found that the English and Spanish versions don’t teach the same thing for the same Sundays.

I find myself in charge of the nursery-High School ministries at the Hispanic Ministry at our church. I am starting from scratch. We have been using Gospel Publishing House curriculum for Sunday School because they have Spanish material, but the English and Spanish are not parallel. do you know of anyone who has parallel curriculum?

Anyone out there have a English/Spanish curriculum solution for her? Leave your answers in the comments.

This episode we look at how to build a children’s sermon and service from the ground up. Whether you’re using curriculum or starting from scratch it can be difficult to keep your kid’s attention while preaching a children’s sermon. The tips in this podcast will help you from start to finish.

Resources:

• Ireland Photos
• Work Flowy
• avs4you.com
• Muddy River Media
• FreeCountdowns.net
• Free-Loops.com

I promised these a while back. Sorry it took so long!

These were made from door panels.

How do we respond when a gifted volunteer says goodbye?

We also talk about how to handle reporting suspected child abuse, board members and “stupid good guys”.

Also go listen to my audio journal to hear about my awesome Sunday experience where my daughter acted as my assistant for Sunday service.

I know it’s been February since we’ve done a show… but real life gets busy and podcasting had to take a back seat. We’re slowly rolling out new content on most of our NLCast Network shows… and this one is on the list.

Leave a comment with some topics or questions you’d like to have addressed and maybe we’ll get a show out sooner than later.

God bless!

Stage presence is one of the most important things a person speaking to children can have. It is equal parts entertainment, education and discipline. This week we look at stage presence and offer practical tips on how to improve your communication skills. We also look at several things not to do while on stage.

Links Mentioned:

• Cheap audio/video editing suite – http://www.avs4you.com
• Countdowns – http://www.muddyrivermedia.org
• Free Countdowns – http://www.freecountdowns.net/main.html

Email us: helpimacp@gmail.com
Call us: 209-5NLCast
Follow James on Twitter
Friend James on Facebook

Since our last show I’ve gotten a few questions on how to create countdowns, how to edit videos and audio clips and sound effects, so I hijacked this episode to share some of the resources I use for animated full-motion backgrounds, animated clip art, game sounds, background tracks and more. I share free software and other resources as well.

Links Mentioned:

• Adobe Audition – Audio editing software.
• Sony Vegas – Video editing software.
• Audacity – Free audio editor for PC. (Tutorial)
• Windows Live Movie Maker – Free video editing software for the PC. (Tutorial)
• Animation Factory – The best and cheapest source for motion backgrounds, animated clip art, PowerPoint backgrounds.
• Free Sound effects – freesound.org
• Great Sound effects, not free – soundsnap.com
• NewGrounds’ Audio Portal – An excellent resource for driving music to go behind a game or countdown.
• High Voltage Kids Ministry – Game music, altar music, video countdowns, curriculum
• Countdown Creator – Quickly and easily merge music, backgrounds and text to create custom video countdowns.

Email us: helpimacp@gmail.com
Call us: 209-5NLCast
Follow James on Twitter
Friend James on Facebook

Games don’t have to be wasted time. This week we discuss the role stage games play in a children’s service, how they can be used to teach, and how to use them effectively.

I’m planning to build a light-weight, portable set for our children’s church. Portable and Light-Weight usually don’t go hand-in-hand with the words Sturdy and Long-lasting but that’s what I’m going for.

This is the scale model I created from office supplies to see how everything would look before I started spending money.

It was created to be broken down and packed in a closet each week. Each set of two panels fold back on themselves for transport. Even the steps break down into 7 small boards with no glue or nails.

Instead of building traditional flats I’ll be using hollow core door panels or 2″ Styrofoam depending on which I can get cheaper.

See the photo set of my Children’s Ministry Set Maquette on Flickr.

**Update** Don’t miss this year’s story, “The Birthday Story“

Do you need a story, illustrated sermon, or object lesson for your Christmas, Christmas Eve or Candlelight Service? How about for Children’s Church or Youth Group? I’d like to suggest my original Christmas story, “The Very Last Room” that I wrote for my own Christmas Eve service last year.

What would you do if your family had taken the very last room in Bethlehem… just before the holy family arrived? This story follows a young boy and his family on their way to Bethlehem to be taxed. They end up taking the very last room available in the city forcing Mary and Joseph to take the stable out back. You’ll love how this story comes together and the strong evangelistic message it shares. The story is fully illustrated and stylized to fit the time period, but with a modern twist.

For your donation of only $10 I will send you a zip file containing a pdf of my original story “The Very Last Room” and a Powerpoint containing the illustrations. The story is scripted to match with the slide show as you tell the story to your family, class, church, or children’s group.

Hear the story yourself before you donate:

Make your donation and I’ll send you a copy right away!

The Very Last Room – Christmas Story – $10 Donation

Practical tips and steps to take when seeking a part or full-time children’s ministry position.

Mentioned Sites and Resources:

My Spanish Missions Trip Experience

CMConnect.org

Kidology.org

The Very Last Room – Christmas Story – If you’d like a copy of the story and the slide show, request it or make a $5 donation to the show.

I had the rare opportunity to go to Spain over Thanksgiving week to minister to Missionary Kids (MK’s). Each year the missionaries from all over Southern Europe get together for a traditional Thanksgiving and combine it with an annual business meeting and retreat. The kids tag along and until this year were usually kept busy with games and activities. This year they wanted something different. Most MK’s don’t get to experience any form of child-centered ministry or anything remotely close to what we’d call Kids Church. So Rev. Tony Gryskiewicz, missionary to the MK’s of Southern Europe, made a call to America to see if he could get a Children’s Pastor to come and minister to these children.

That call resulted in my Pastor approving me for the trip… my first out of the country. I got my expedited passport and prepared three 2 hour services. The trick was that two of the services were one after the other. A 2 hour service, a thirty minute break, then another 2 hour service. That’s a lot of church… especially for kids. Couple that with having limited supplies and being with kids who are bi-lingual and have been raised in various cultures across Europe… and you might understand that I was a little stressed. These folks were paying hundreds of dollars to ship me across the Atlantic… I’d better be good.

Long story short, it was an amazing experience. Even though the airline lost my luggage with my clothing, the missionary family’s Christmas gifts, and almost all of my ministry equipment… it was still a success. The kids were so hungry and eager for a children’s church experience with God that I wondered what I was ever so stressed over. I told the folks who would ask later, “I felt like I didn’t have to work at all… Like I was cheating at children’s ministry.” Everything went so well… and not because of any talent or skill of mine… I felt like the whole experience was “charmed” (for lack of a better word) because God was ensuring that these MK’s got what they needed.

Missionaries sacrifice so much to do the job they’ve been called to do. It’s a ton of little things: no home insulation, no immediate family nearby, no Walmart, no Pop Tarts. Then there’s being judged by the unsaid rules of another culture, bad conversion rates from the Dollar to the Euro, $1000 dollars for a license to drive, and not to mention having to leave your ministry every three and a half years to come back to America to raise funds to do it all again.

Missionaries are heroes… and so are their kids. These eight children that I spent over 6 hours with in a 4th grade classroom turned children’s church were some of the most un-spoiled kids I’d ever met. They were kids who’d been raised up outside the commercialism of the States and had parents who were literally living out the Great Commission. You could see a silent determination behind the eyes of each one. They knew they were sacrificing something… but it was for a great purpose.

During one of the services I made reference to the things they had given up as a part of a Missionary family. A few chimed in about various products they missed, mostly food items. I remember one 5 year old boy said, “I miss Cheese Puffs!” and the rest nodded in agreement. Then a 10 year old girl raised her hand, “We miss these things, but we don’t need them. We’re just glad to be helping our parents, learning another language and another culture.” The rest nodded in agreement. Wow, as they say. Just wow.

So hats off to Missionaries and their families. You are the heroes of my world. It was a true honor to be called out to minister to your kids. I only hate that I probably got more out of it than they did.

How to communicate to Parents, Children, Ministry Leaders, Volunteers and your Pastor. We cover bulletins, fliers, newsletters, email lists, Facebook, and more.

The Very Last Room – Christmas Story – If you’d like a copy of the story and the slide show, request it or make a $5 donation to the show.

How do you respond to parents who’s children do nothing wrong?

Show Links:

Rod Puppet Made From Office Supplies

Children’s Ministry Monthly Episode 2 – Discipline

PodcastKid.com – A great podcast for children 3-12 by James Kennison and his daughter.

The Very Last Room – Christmas Story – If you’d like a copy of the story and the slide show, request it or make a $5 donation to the show.

After nearly three years producing podcasts under the name Children’s Ministry Monthly, I’ve decided to rebrand the show. “Help! I’m A Children’s Pastor” seems to encapsulate the direction the show has taken almost since the very beginning. CMMonthly has always been a show for folks who are just getting started in kids ministry… or who have found themselves thrust into the ministry almost by accident. My hope is that the new name will attract even more of the folks this show is targeting.

Dropping the “monthly” from the name also allows me to consider producing more than one show per month. Right now I’m considering doing a bi-weekly half-hour format. We’ll see.

So it’s still me, James Kennison, and the same focus… you don’t even have to change anything in iTunes or your RSS feeds. Just keep enjoying the content and consider contributing questions, tips or other feedback: helpimacp@gmail.com

The script for this Sunday’s puppet lesson called for a second puppet character that resembled the first. Since I created the costume for our regular character from scratch, this wasn’t going to be easy or cheap. I started thinking about craft supplies, foam balls for heads, dowel rods for the body, elastic to create tension for the jaw. I even went as far as to look up simple puppet making online. Then I had this idea… why not make myself out of paper?

The first step was to draw the character out in Photoshop. (You can download the finished image as a PDF if you’d like to use it yourself) Then I printed it out on card stock with a color printer. You could just as easily draw your character directly on the paper though. Then I cut it out and cut a slit at the bottom of the black space. I slid a narrow strip of paper up through the slit and attached it with Super Glue to the top edge of the characters bottom lip. Instantly I was able to manipulate the mouth… but I had to use both hands.

I added some tongue depressors to the back for support with Super Glue. I added a short length of rubber band to the back to pull the mouth back up when I pulled down. Then I wrapped the end of the mouth manipulation strip around a bit of Popsicle stick so I could pull it down with one hand using my thumb. And that was it!

Check out the video of the finished puppet so you can see what I’m talking about here.

I’m very pleased with the result. I’ll defiantly be making more of these… and I’m pretty sure Little Scripture Man will become a regular on Sundays.

What do you think? Will you try your hand at making a paper puppet? Shoot me you thoughts in the comments.

I divide my kids up by grade. Kindergarten, and 1st through 5th… each have their own section to sit in. I then divide those six groups into two teams (almost like the traditional boys vs girls): 1st, 3rd & 4th vs K, 2nd and 5th. This keeps things pretty balanced and allows me to sit kids of the same age together which builds friendships and helps new kids find friends quickly.

It may sound confusing, but with my Street Signs, it’s super simple for the kids to keep track of where they sit. I’m presenting my rough plans and some photos of the completed project. It’s not a step-by-step by any means… but it should give you enough information to make your own. You could use this idea for pretty much any sign holder you might need. Sure beats paying hundreds of dollars for commercial bases and sign holders.

Here’s the completed sign and stand. The PVC was all 1 1/2″ Solid Core PVC Pipe. The signs are Aluminum and I ordered them from a local vinyl cutting sign shop.

Product List (per sign):
1 – 4’ PVC
3 – 12” PVC
2 – 4.5” PVC
5 – 90° Elbows
1 – Threaded Cap
1 Threaded Plug
1 – T Joint
1 – Cotter Pin
PVC Primer
PVC Glue
Silver Hammered Finish Spray Paint

After collecting all of the pieces and cutting them to size, I glued them up according to the plan sketch above. I used a hand-held miter saw to cut a slot about half-way down the top of each Threaded Plug to hold the signs. Then I spray painted the assembled stands. After they dried I slid the sign into the slot and drilled a small hold through the plug and sign. I used a cotter pin to keep the sign fixed to the plug.

The base of each unit can be removed from the main shaft. The signs can be removed by unscrewing the plug from the threaded cap or by removing the cotter pin. Keeping some of the parts loose allows me to store them easily… or replace broken pieces without having to start completely over. The poles take the most wear and tear because kids like to lean on them… the poles can flex without breaking off from the base… but can easily be tightened with just a little downward force.

We’ve been using them for about two months now and they still look as good as the first day. The hammered finish spray paint is very tough, sticks well and resists chipping well. They’re very light-weight so they’re easy to carry and won’t hurt a child if they tip over…. not that they ever have. The wide base keeps them upright and secure. This was a successful project and with a relatively low price.

I spent about $90 on PVC and $90 on the vinyl signs, so around $180 total for six signs. Compare that to the quote from the sign shop for their stands and signs at $399 each!

What do you think? I’d love to get your feedback in the comments. If you have any questions, post them and I’ll respond!

This month we’re clearing out the in-box answering your submitted questions about volunteers, delegation, administration, outreach ideas, moving to a new ministry position and positions for youth to help in kids church.

Links & Resources:

• The Very Last Room – Original Christmas story. Imagine if your family were to take the last room in Bethlehem, just before Jesus’ family came up.
• PodcastKid.com – Podcast for kids. Moral in every show. By Pastor James and his 5 year old daughter, Jenna. Subscribe in iTunes.
• Blog Entry: How Can I Get Volunteers From A Small Congregation
• How To: “Usher” Offering Machines
• What I’ve Learned After Three Weeks In A New Position
• Discipline Mini-Casts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.

One of our listeners, Gordon, recently sent in the following question:

“I was wondering if you have any ideas that could help get volunteers out of a small congregation (80-100) to help out consistently.”

I wanted to share my response with the rest of you.

Getting your pastor on board is the biggest thing. If it is his passion to get volunteers, it’ll become the church’s passion to provide them.

Pray to the Lord of the harvest to send forth laborers. God loves these kids more than you do… put it to him! If he wants these kids properly ministered too… then he’ll have to provide the help!

Remember to be faithful with what you have. It’s easy to get bitter and angry with parents, choir members, pew sitters and the like. They’re all too easy to get angry at when you’re stressed but God has promised that if we’re faithful over little that he’ll make us masters over much. Complaining or bitterness will ruin it so don’t grow weary in your well doing!

The right people are worth waiting for. We can be tempted to fill the positions we have with whoever we can find to fill them. But I don’t want bodies … I want hearts. I want people that God has called. People God has called don’t quit after 2 weeks. They don’t leave you hanging. You don’t have to wonder if they’ll show up this week. AND… the only thing worse than having no workers is having the wrong workers. Ministry is not dealing with drama, gossip and issues with your workers… it’s what you do when that stuff isn’t an issue. While you wait for the right people, just trust that God is perfecting them, preparing them for the day they will serve with you in HIS ministry.

For a while now I’ve wanted to create my own Vacuum-based offering machine… ever since I saw them pop up on CMConnect.org. The only thing that kept me from making my own was the doubt that I could find the right materials and be able to cobble them together in a way that would be air tight and still look presentable.

The idea is that you can increase your kids ministry offering by having the kids trade their coins for rubber bounce balls. Then at offering time they come forward and the offering machine sucks up the balls. The machine has a clear tank so the kids see their offering go inside. Fun right? Yes!

Here are some examples of what I’ve seen out there in the CM wild:

We’ll I’m thrilled to say that I have finally made my own. They look great and they were dead simple. Plus, I got everything I needed at the local Lowe’s store.

They have these new shop vacs that mount to the top of a 5 gallon bucket.

The only problem is that 5 gallon buckets aren’t clear. They’re typically white. But today I found these.

They come in various colors and are the closest thing to clear you’re going to get. They’re located right next to the regular buckets in the paint section at Lowe’s. I bought a blue and a green one.

Then you just unpack the vac and stick it on the bucket… you’re done!

The bucket is pretty clear on it’s own… but I think I’m going to add a little LED light to the bottom of the vac that will turn on with the power switch. That will totally make this thing look amazing and transparent. I may decide to spray paint the vac to match the bucket. They have spray paint that will stick to plastic. I’ve had a lot of luck with the “Hammered Finish” spray paints.

I decided not to go with the solid rubber bouncy balls. They’re a pain when kids drop them and they’re heavy in bulk. I chose small “koosh” style “hedge balls” from USToy.com (the small ones).

So there you go! Super simple offering machines. The vacs run $20 each and the buckets were like $4-6 bucks each. You can’t buy a regular shop vac for less than $40! So this solution is simple and cheap.

I’ll be sure to post pictures when I get the lights installed and have them in use.

What do you think?

UPDATE 9/18/2010:

I went ahead and added a light to each offering machine. The result is incredible!

How did I do it? It’s going to be a bit tough to explain. I’m NOT an electrician and I can’t promise this thing won’t burn up or melt down… so I’m not going to give a step-by-step on this one… just find someone who knows what they’re doing and they’ll know how I did it.

What did I do? I’ll answer that. I went back to Lowe’s and picked up a couple of under-cabinet lights. They were around 10 bucks each.

I drilled a hole for the chord and mounted the light to the bottom of the motor casing. I had to remove some of the plastic reinforcement to get the lamp to sit snug against the bottom of the case.

The hole led up through the top close to where the vac’s power chord entered the motor casing. I didn’t go up through the motor itself so I couldn’t mess up the suction or get moving parts mixed with wires. I removed a bit more plastic next to the power chord to allow my wire to fit once I screwed everything back together. All you can see now is just a tiny bit of the chord.

I opened the motor casing on the vac and wired the lamp to the vac motor chords after they left the main switch. This way the light comes on when I use the unit… no separate switch for the light. The following picture just shows the wires… not my modification. I just split one red wire at a time and put them together with one of the wires from the lamp with a wire nut. Then did the next.

Then I put everything back together and tried it out. It works!

What do we think now? I’m thrilled!

Tips and lessons on improving your children’s church order of service.

I was going through my very own storage area and happened upon some old puppets. I realized they were standing up on their own which was odd. It turned out they were being supported by toilet plungers! Genius!

So if you need a super simple, super cheap option for keeping your puppets vertical and clean, go pick up a cheap toilet plunger!

I’ve been trying to start children’s church service preparation on Mondays. We have staff most of the morning and then a late lunch. By the time I get my workday started there isn’t much time left so I’ve been cracking open the curriculum and attempting to put my service together and done.

This has been working very well. First, I’m accomplishing something on a day that that otherwise wouldn’t allow me to. It allows me plenty of time to collect props, object lessons and recruit actors and even give away parts of the sermon to up-and-coming future children’s pastors in my volunteer staff. It also frees up the entire rest of your week to focus on other non-service stuff like policy, organization, brochures and (God forbid) planning.

I highly suggest doing service prep as early in the week as possible. It’s a little tough to want to jump into the next week just after getting done with a Sunday… but the payoff is worth it. The only negative I’ve found, if it can even be called negative, is that I find that I’ve got to add a couple of review times to my week so that I can keep the content fresh in my mind. The balance of it is that I’m giving more thought to the topic and scriptures over all then when I started on Thursday.

When do you do service prep? Do you have any tips to share? Add them to the comments!

Have you ever had a “Full Moon Sunday”? That’s what I call those Sunday morning services where everything should have gone perfectly… but for some random reason the kids are totally wound up. You feel like every bit of your preparation was pointless. And for me it always seems to be a service topic that I really thought would otherwise have made a huge impact. We’re not talking about a few kids causing problems. It’s more of a general restless din of noise and movement. It’s most frustrating because since it’s everyone and it’s nothing you can exactly put your finger on it’s all but impossible to change the behavior. Short of putting the entire group in time-out or marching them all in to their parents you just have to put your head down and just charge through. It’ll be 1pm soon.

I call these happenings “Full-Moon Sundays” because I’ve had friends who are nurses tell me that every full moon all kinds of crazy things start going down at the hospitals. Tons of extra babies are born and lots or weird injuries come walking into the emergency rooms. There seems to be no other explanation other than the phase of the moon. So when I have a weird Sunday where everything goes right but the kids, I have to blame something… so I blame the moon. I know the moon has no inherent power. I know it’s not really its fault. But it gets the blame anyway. As Milli Vanilli once said, “You gotta blame it on something”.

I don’t know that I have any advice or tips for this particular situation. I mostly just want to know if anyone else experiences this and if you do that you’re not alone. Here are a few thoughts on Full-Moon Sundays.

1. Don’t take it personally. If you were properly prepared you can’t blame yourself.

2. Don’t change anything. You’ll be tempted to rewrite policy or at very least change your program. Don’t ever make a permanent decision to fix a temporary problem.

3. Put your head  down and charge through. Honestly, I believe the more potential your service has to change a life, the more your enemy will attempt to cause problems in your service. So don’t quit! Keep speaking, keep following that schedule! Sure, be open to what God may want to do, but don’t make a change based on how you feel in the moment.

Am I the only one who has “Full-Moon Sundays”? Maybe so. Either way I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Both your experiences and tips for dealing and getting through are welcomed.

I did this little rap video to “Wrap Up” our BGMC (Boys and Girls Missionary Challenge) service on the Canary Islands. Enjoy!

This month we’re talking about the importance of children’s praise & worship with Jean Thomason, aka Miss Pattycake. I hope you enjoy listening to her as much as I loved recording her.

Visit Miss. Pattycake online at http://www.misspattycake.com

I found a link to this excellent article on ChildrensMinistry.com via a buddy on Facebook. I was sure I’d be listed as one of the top ten things that would ruin a good kids ministry… but I guess I’m number 11 or 12.

Number 1 on the list is communication.

1. Lack of communication — If people don’t know what’s happening in your ministry they assume nothing of consequence is happening. Refuse to communicate, and your children’s ministry will never be a priority to the church and community. People vital to your ministry need to know what’s going on in order to support the work. If they don’t know about it, they can’t support it.

Talk about your ministry with your pastor, other staff members, volunteers, parents, the community and children. Promote your ministry in church publications, community advertising, and best yet, word of mouth from satisfied participants.

If I had an 11 or 12 to add they would be:

11. Lack of Personal Spiritual Growth – It can be easy to get disconnected from the “Big Church” and miss the worship, sermons and fellowship that nurture and grow most Christians. It’s also easy to fall into the habit of only reading the Bible and studying in order to create lessons and sermons for ministry. Make sure some of it is just for you! Make time in your schedule to go to an Adult Service at least once a month.

12. A Bad Attitude – Children’s Ministers are often tempted to be huge complainers. Often they’re under the impression they’re just being visionary… but vision needs to be balanced with being completely grateful and content with the resources God has given you already. There’s a spiritual principal here… if you’re faithful over the little (even a little budget or a little team), God will make you master over much.

Read the article here: 10 Things That Can Ruin Your Children’s Ministry

My wife and I have been asked to do a 13 week class on Parenting. Here’s the video we did to promote it in Big Church.

Prizes in children’s ministry are tricky things. The general thinking by leaders is that kids like winning prizes. So we use them at outreaches and for special events. We’ll give away a couple of bikes or even an iPod or two. The hope is that the prize will bring in a lot of new faces and that we’ll have a lot of happy winners. But all to often, in reality what I’ve seen is two happy winners… and a whole mess of disappointed kids and parents who didn’t win the big prize. I’ve seen a lot of new faces in the crowd, but none of them were smiling on the way out. So are we really getting what we wanted and hoped for or is there a better way?

I don’t do the big giveaways… and here’s why:

1. They cost a lot.
2. They only bless one or two kids.
3. They make the rest of the kids sad, upset, disappointed, jealous or even hateful.

Kids don’t deal well with the concept of Random. They get it in theory… they just don’t like it. It works fine for the randomly chosen winner of said prize… but to the rest of your group Random suddenly turns into just being Unfair! Remember how that felt when you were a kid? It felt Unfair!

What I suggest instead of a big prize drawing is a prize that everyone gets or must be earned. I don’t mind telling a kid that someone else got a prize because they said last week’s bible verse… because I can transform their disappointment into determination. I tell that child that they could get the same thing next week if they say their verses too.

Here are some examples. In an outreach situation, rather than a flier that tells of an iPod that will be given away at the event… what about saying that every child that comes out will get a bag of sour Skittles and a cold soda… plus a special prize at the end of service! Every child wins! And you’ve probably spent less on the candy and soda than the iPod!

For a special event at church you could have a prize for new visitors… and the kid who brought them! Every child has a chance to ‘win’ this prize… and any kid who doesn’t bring a friend that week could do so the next for a second chance.

Just a bit of thinking from a child’s perspective will help guide you when planning your next promotion in children’s church or sunday school. Here are a few of my guiding principals.

1. Prizes shouldn’t be so big that it breaks the hearts of those who don’t win… but still good enough to work hard for.
2. Every child has a controllable chance to win the prize. If they don’t win it’s because they didn’t earn it.
3. All of the prizes are always the same per event. That way children aren’t comparing what others got over (or under) themselves.

Some would argue that it’s important that kids learn self-control and good sportsmanship… and I would agree. But I would also argue that we don’t need to create situations that put kids in needlessly difficult situations. I don’t know about you but I want my visitors leaving my service happy!

Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments.

Thought I’ve done a clean comedy podcast called Nobody’s Listening and a marriage and family podcast called Geek Loves Nerd and finally this here children’s ministry podcast called Children’s Ministry Monthly… I’ve always wanted to do a show for kids.

Jenna and I have been doing little shows here and there over the past couple of years called JennaCasts… but they were just bonus shows added to the Geek Loves Nerd podcast feed. Recently we’ve decided to split off and combine my daughter’s love of talking with my desire to produce a podcast for children.

Podcast Kid is a podcast for kids that focuses on topics that matter to kids ages 3-8. It’s a weekly half-hour show that features conversations, advice, silly songs and stories from Jenna, her Dad and Mom and a silly clown called JoJo.

Go check out Podcast Kid and if you like it, share it with some kids you know!

What issues and challenges to PK’s face in church? How does it influence their walk with God? What’s it like when the parent is their children’s pastor? All these questions and more answered as James interviews Christian and Lydia, his own pastor’s kids.

This episode also features an amazing interview with The Lads, an amazing rock group from New Zealand focusing on tweens and family ministry.

Sponsor: DrawYouAPicture.com – for ministry logos as low as $65 bucks!

Resource of the month: Crazy and creative one-minute games from the show Minute To Win It.

Old school teachers will demand respect from their students. New school understands the need to earn it. Lately I’ve found myself in a position of finding and striking a balance between both demanding and earning the respect of my new mini-congregation.

I fall on the new school side of things for the most part. I believe a good teacher will be respected when they give respect, love, acceptance, guidance and useful content. It’s basically the whole, “You can’t make a withdrawal until you’ve made a deposit” thing. But it only works with children who have a typical or ‘normal’ response to a proper teacher/child relationship.

The typical response is of course, respect. Depending on the age you may also get hero-status or even complete enthrallment (pre-school). For some children, however, your kindness is seen as weakness, a vulnerability to be taken advantage of. This is the case most typically with undisciplined children. They may see all adults as their servants, same as they do their parents. Teachers therefore become just another grown-up that is supposed to entertain them, give them treats, and cater to their whims. So kindness and caring are misinterpreted… expected and unappreciated. Any expectations you have are simply suggestions and are ignorable… unless you find the balance between earning respect and demanding it.

For the most part, it’s the child himself who can help you find it. If earning isn’t working, it’s naturally time to move into demanding. But how do we do that without being a tyrant? Is it even possible? I believe in cases where earning isn’t working, demanding is the only alternative. But how?

I’m a Teacher. I give respect, I deserve it in return.

I naturally give proper respect to the students I minister to. I do not mock them. I am not mean to them. I greet them warmly and am polite to them. I am also kind and considerate when a child is in a bad mood, is un-churched, a visitor, or has special needs. These children need extra compassion. But even though I serve these children and their families, I am not their servant. I do not deserve to be mocked, made to feel stupid or unappreciated. The respect I give not only serves to show Christ’s love, but to also be an example to follow.

I defend the Golden Rule… even in reverse.

The Rule: Treat others how you want them to treat you. I wholeheartedly believe in this rule and will defend it. I will treat others how I want them to treat me AND you will treat me how I treat you. At least that will be my goal for you if you’re in my ministry. Not just because I deserve to be treated right. But because it will help you be more like Christ. Therefore it is a part of proper discipleship.

I understand that they must respect me to be led by me.

Why all this talk about respect? Why do I sound like a 67 year old football coach? Because I believe mutual respect is important. I can’t teach kids I don’t think are worth my time. And likewise kids won’t learn from someone they don’t think is worth listening to. If they don’t respect you, they won’t care what you have to say.

I earn and demand respect.

So I’m a little bit old school and a little bit new school. I understand it’s important to be someone worthy of respect. It’s important to pour into a life before you can expect anything from it… but when all that fails… it becomes a discipline issue. Discipline issues are handled like any other bad behavior, by discouraging it and providing benefits for the alternative. So in my kid’s church your son or daughter may find themselves in time out for smarting off… and if they keep it up… they’ll be sitting in church with you for a few weeks. When they’re ready to be respectful, they get to enjoy all of the perks that children’s ministry has to offer.

Just about everything we do in Children’s Ministry is about the long term. It’s about the investment. This comic series by my podcast mentor, Scott Johnson, called The Bigfoot Diaries really spoke to me. It reminded me that our investment in children, no matter how small… matters.

Start with this one, 2, 3, end here.

Check it out and add your thoughts in the comments below.

This month we address issues that discourage children’s ministers with Children’s Pastor, Mark Turner and Pen/Florida District Children’s Education Director, Grant Foster.

This past Valentine’s day I had a bunch of valentine’s printed up for kids to give out. They doubled as invitations to a special service back at the church. I had it set up so that the visitor and the child who invited them would both get a prize. I had high hopes for this outreach attempt.

My wife and I bought 60 heart-shaped boxes of mixed chocolates from Sam’s Club in anticipation of at least 30 visitors. Statistically I could only expect 10 as you typically get a 1% response and I’d passed out 1000 invites… but faith and hope have to fit in there somewhere right?

Fast-forward to the end of our Valentine’s day service and we’d given away 10 boxes of chocolate. Five to visitors and five to the kids who brought them. I can’t say I was devastated… but I was defiantly disappointed. As we geek-types say, “FAIL!”.

The next morning during devotions I was journaling about the whole thing. I wrote up how hopeful I had been… and how stupid I felt wasting the church’s money buying way to much candy. Then God slapped me in the head. He does that.

I wrote down the thought that suddenly entered my head:

“When you’re disappointed, you forget to be thankful”.

He was right… I was so focused on what I had wanted to accomplish for the Kingdom I was totally overlooking what God had actually accomplished. Five children had experienced a church service for maybe the first time. I also remembered that one of the visitors had been accompanied by their entire family! A whole family had come to church because of a Valentine’s day card… and I had not once thought to give praise to God for any of this… because I had wanted to do more. Naturally I spent the rest of the devotion time in praise. One child is precious to God… five ain’t nothing to turn your nose up at in His Kingdom.

It’s easy to get disappointed in Children’s ministry. I’ve probably spent more time in the last 10 years being disappointed that any other feeling. Disappointed about attendance, volunteer commitment, pastoral support, storage, how many folks join the choir… on and on. My heart has been in the right place for most of the time: I just wanted to do more for God! If I had more resources, if I had more volunteers, if I had more support… how much more effective could this ministry be? But I’ve very recently realized that disappointment keeps me from being thankful for what I have and for how God is using it.

I still set goals. I still have high hopes… but from now on, no matter how things turn out… I will remember to be thankful and give praise to God. If I believe that he is in control and that he is good… I have to believe that he knew how things would turn out… and that he had some hand in the results. My disappointment tells God I’m not happy with his work. Well, not anymore.

One of my kids (Cheer Girl) sent me this video because it was “sooo funny”. Not only funny… but super creative and high-quality. I thought I’d share it here in case you could ever use it.

James interviews his wife Jennifer about her recent involvement in the office-side of the children’s ministry he directs at their new ministry position.

This Month’s Resource:

Spiral Wishing Wells for pre-school offering: http://www.spiralwishingwells.com/toy

Call or email in your feedback: cmmonthly@gmail.com or (218)MONTHLY (666-8459).

What’s the main difference between regular cereal and generic. The packaging. I know kids say they can tell the difference… just like we adults swear we can taste the difference between tap water and bottled water… but in reality it’s the way the cereal is packaged that makes it more exciting.

I believe packaging is important in children’s ministry as well… especially to those of us who don’t have a lot of money and resources. We can’t all print every flier in full color and our check-in stations may never look like a children’s museum lobby, but there are several things we can all do to improve the packaging of our children’s ministry. Doing so will excite the children, volunteers and the parents we serve.

1. Laminate Signs

For some reason when I laminate a piece of paper, people pay more attention to it than when I just print and stick.

2. Pre-Printed Paper for Fliers

Even if you can’t print in color, you can buy paper with pre-printed backgrounds… or even better use a high-volume, low-cost print shop and have a whole mess of custom printed paper to make fliers and handouts on.

3. A Great Logo

It may cost a little money, but getting a great quality logo is a great way to package your ministry. I happen to do low-cost, high-quality logos over at DrawYouAPicture.com. Most of the time ministry logos only cost $65 and I’ve yet to charge more than $99 for a single logo.

4. Dress Up For Church

I know most of we children’s ministers don’t like church clothes but dressing ourselves up is probably the easiest way to dress up our own ministry. People outside of kids church never see your ministry… but they do see you.

5. Keep Classroom Decorations Fresh

Every church classroom I’ve ever seen has had old stuff on the walls. It’s been up so long that no one even sees it anymore. Same with bulletin boards. It costs little to nothing to keep these things current. You just throw out the old stuff and put up the new. And when you do put it up, put it up straight, centered, and without visible tape or staples. Thumbtacks still look good, but double sided tape looks even better!

6. Clean Storage Areas

Your pastor hates your storage room. It bothers him. It bothers you… but you’re used to it. It would bother your parents if they saw it. Clean it up… or at least get it organized. Same with classroom cabinets, drawers and countertops. Old curriculum, handouts, copies, old cookies… they all need to be given away or thrown away.

7. Clear Copies

This is a pet peeve so bear with me here. I hate it when I can see page numbers, curriculum titles, and copied hole punch holes on handouts. I want my copies to look first generation. A little whiteout goes a long way in improving the look of your copies. You can even keep a strip of paper on hand to place over the holes on punched originals. And for the love of all that is holy, make sure your copies are square to the paper.

Packaging isn’t the most important part of children’s ministry… but it is an important part. When you take pride in the little things the side-effect is that others will respect what you do more. Plus God seems to bless folks who are faithful in the little things.

We recently had a week of prayer here at Suncoast and were encouraged to create an experience for each of the folks who would be praying. This is the display I came up with and I wanted to share it with you.

The idea was to create an interactive object lesson. I wanted the folks praying to 1) get a feel for what we do and 2) open their minds as to what children’s ministry is about.

The concept of using a garden came almost instantly. I knew I wanted to have the people plant a seed in the ground as an example of the seeds of God’s Word that are planted each week in the children’s department.

I tend to think of the programs we provide in four groups: Mentoring, Foundational, Life Application and Godly Care, so I created four rows of plants, each with their own “seed pack” which illustrated this.

I quickly decided that having flower pots was going to work better than just having a bunch of dirt on a table. It might not be clear that it’s supposed to be a garden and I didn’t know how I was going to keep the dirt contained without a large (ugly) pan of some sort.

A quick trip to Home Depot and I had 16 flower pots, 12 perennials, 3 packages of seed, one small pot (to hold the seed), one section of border fence, 4 paint stirrers, cheap gloves, a watering can and some potting soil.

To create the “seed packets” I turned to Google images for inspiration. I took the best elements from several designs and created what you see above in Photoshop. I printed them out on a color printer and cut, folded and pasted them to look just like the real thing (including a little flap at the top). I cut a slot in the top and bottom of each and fed through a paint stick and stuck each into one of the flower pots.

Each of the flowers were transplanted into one of the pots to give it that “just planted” look. The four remaining pots were filled with potting soil and put at the front of each row for planting the seeds. The fence section was simply screwed into the back of a 4-foot plastic table. The green plastic sheeting was a round tablecloth we found in a closet. The seeds were placed in a cute little pot.

Lastly we added the watering can, the gloves (with fresh dirt applied), prayer need cards and a tent-fold card with instructions on how to use the station.

Everyone loved the display. It was a hit with my leaders and the folks who came out to pray. Someone even tried to water the seed they planted (no water in the can). They were really into it I guess.

The instruction card said: Each week we plant the seeds of God’s word into the lives of your children. Take a seed and imagine it is a spiritual truth to be taught to a child. Prayerfully plant the seed in the soil and pray that His Word will grow and be fruitful in the lives of our children.

Pastor even let me come up to explain the inspiration behind the the meaning of each element in the display. It was truly a blessing.

Currently the display is waiting in the children’s church room for Sunday. I’m going to have the kids file past and plant a seed of their own and pray that God’s Word will grow in their own hearts.

I hope this has been an inspiration to you. Feel free to rip it off completely! Just let me know how it turns out! If you have any questions you can email me.

Gever Tulley runs a camp called Tinkering School. I would have sold all of my Star Wars figures to go to a camp like that as a child. This video, and the idea expressed in it, has really gotten me thinking. It’s not about exposing kids to danger for danger’s sake… it’s about not limiting their exposure to basic realities to the point that they are clueless and cannot keep themselves safe. It also has me thinking about involving hobbies, tinkering… pretty much anything beyond the standard puppet teams, dance, drama, and music… into ministry to children. Also check out this video by the same fella: 5 Dangerous For Kids.

He has a book out I want as well.

[Thanks Godbout for the link!]

More kids are getting mobile phones: Last year, more than 35% of U.S. children ages 10-11 had cellphones, almost double the amount in 2005, according to Mediamark data, via eMarketer. And more than 5% of 6-7-year-olds had cellphones last year.

That leaves the 8-9-year-olds in the 20% bracket. When will we have to add “Turn off your phones” to the Children’s Church rules? Have you already?

[via Gizmodo]

I can count on more than two hands how many times I’ve had disgruntled volunteers express to me their desire to involve more parents in their ministry or program. Though I do agree that it seems few parents take the same interest in their children’s spiritual lives as they do their extracurricular lives, I do take issue with this complaint. I rarely see a true desire for parental involvement but rather volunteers who are either desperate for help or who are struggling and angry and want ‘pay-backs’.

Maybe I’m a bit to stuck on principal but I think motive makes a huge difference here. I’m not interested in recruiting parents only to place them with volunteers who have agendas or misguided expectations. I’m not going to set up my new recruits to be a scapegoat for some imagined wrong.

To a point I understand the view some ministers get of the parents they serve. We struggle with their kids while they get to go to service. We watch them socialize in the hall while we wait to go home because they haven’t picked up their child. It’s easy to start thinking that things would be different if they were on our side of the fence. Parents would get a taste of their own medicine so to speak. Plus, we need more help anyway… it’s a perfect fit, right?

Parents can’t be both our enemy and our salvation.

(selah)

They are neither. We have a enemy. We have a Savior. We wage war against one (not flesh and blood) and we pray to the other (to send laborers). It’s not fair or in any way right to recruit parents under the curse of the former and the burden of the latter. When we as ministers, leaders and volunteers realize who our true enemy is and where our help comes from, then we are ready to welcome parental involvement with open arms.

But is it enough to simply involve them? (More on that in later posts.)

In the mean time… what is your experience? Have you ever been cornered by an eager volunteer with the “perfect solution” to your worker shortage? Have you yourself ever struggled with “hating-on” parents? Leave your thoughts and feedback in the comments.

James shares a inspirational story that shows that God uses everything we submit to him and do as unto him for our good and his glory.

The Flashlight House – From Nasty To Move-in Ready In Just One Month

Nativity Story: The Very Last Room

I wrote and illustrated this story for my new church’s Christmas Eve service. Though it’s after Christmas now, I thought I’d share it so I can at least reference it next year.

Imagine if you were the family who took the very last room in Bethlehem… and had to watch Mary being led around back to a stable. That’s the premise of this original Christmas story.

This video was filmed at Highland Park Presbyterian Church on Dec. 13th, 2009 as a part of their Club Christmas Youth Service. It’s awesome.

If you don’t get it… you need to watch this.

Update: Credit to Les aka @hstrykid via Twitter for the find.

1. I’m big on being prepared.

Everything should be finished and ready to go before Sunday morning. 90% of frustration alleviation is preparation!

2. I’m big on timeliness.

Each volunteer depends on the others to be at their post on time to serve their role. Parents and Sunday School Teachers depend on us to open the doors promptly. Starting service on time adds predictability which is important to children when establishing order.

3. I’m big on smooth transitions.

I hate downtime. Volunteers who are doing a part of the service should keep their eyes on their schedule and skip ahead. If their segment is coming up, they should be ready (with their team if they have one) and pass me on the steps going up while I’m coming down.

4. I’m not big on unplanned interruptions.

If someone needs the microphone during the service… they need to have asked for it before… or while I’m not on the stage.

5. I’m big on discipline.

I want us to enjoy our time with the kids… and them with us. The way to do that is to maintain an understanding of mutual respect between ourselves and them.

6. I’m big on giving away segments.

I’m not interested in my children’s church becoming the “Pastor James Show”. If there is a leader who would like to assist by taking a segment here and there… or even every week… they only need tell me. Pretty much anything short of the teaching and altar time is available.

Three weeks already? Has it really been that long? It’s been crazy busy. Not really the work… but learning how to work in a new environment. Nearly everything is new and what isn’t new is done differently. Procedures I learned from one place have really messed me up on this end of things (I pressed 4 to delete a voicemail… should have pressed 2).

Things are wonderful, don’t get me wrong… but rather than talk about the awesome stuff, I’d like to hash out a few things I’ve already learned about starting a new position (aka, things I messed up).

1. Don’t Get Friendly Too Quickly

Wherever you go, there will be people in each church who are similar. Just because knew one of them very well in your old church doesn’t mean that relationship transfers to the new person. One week is way too soon to be making ‘Yo Mama’ jokes.

2. Don’t Snap Judge Anything

When you move positions, you carry along your experiences. Most of those will come in very handy and help you bypass a whole lot of mess. On the other hand, some of it will cause you to assume certain things that were true in your old place to hold true in the new. This is not necessarily the case. Kid flag teams are not always the cheese.

3. Don’t Talk Non-Stop About Your Old Church

Nobody cares what they did there… how hot or cold it was… how good or bad it was. You may have been there for a decade… but God has moved you forward and upward. It’s time to leave those things behind you and press on to the goal that God has for you. That being said however, at my old church… we did a lot of cool stuff.

4. Watch Those First Impressions

The first time people see you they will make a snapshot of you for their future reference. They will choose how they speak to you and what they say based on that snapshot. Make sure you present your true self even if you’re not at all impressed with it. You cannot maintain an image for any long period of time anyway. If you don’t speak in a southern accent normally, it’s not a good idea to adopt one just because you moved South.

I’m all about getting any advice from any of you readers who have made a move such as mine. Any tips you would add? What mistakes have you made? What did you learn? Drop them in the comments.

1. Pastors

Thank God for Senior Pastors. Where would we be without them? Jobless that’s what. Love um or want to strangle them… be thankful for them. Your anointing filters through his office after all.

2. Volunteers

I know we never have enough… but remember to be thankful for those you have!

3. Parents

Where would we be without parents? We’d be preaching to an empty room! Our job is to support and educate them as they raise up their children in the way they should go. No, they’re not all doing it… but thank God for them all anyway.

4. Children

Every one of these little guys is a gift from God. The fact that we have the honor, privilege and responsibility of ministering to them is huge. Thank God for the simple trust they place in us.

5. Resources

Thank God for the Internet and CMConnect.org.

6. Facilities

Maybe you’re meeting in an old choir closet… but be thankful. Just one missions trip will be enough to make you thankful for anything with a roof, floor and air conditioning. Someone will always have it better… and someone will always have it worse.

7. The Call

God called you to minister to his kids. That Call will keep you going when almost nothing else can.

8. Peers

There are others doing what you do… and most of them are more than willing to share what they know… and need the experiences you have gleaned.

9. Mentors

Those who have them, you know why you should be thankful. Those who don’t have one or more… hurry up and get one so you can be thankful too.

10. Spouses

For almost every children’s minister out there, there is a supportive (or at least tolerant) spouse. Thank God for those who help us (or at least allow us) to do what we do.

What are you thankful for in Children’s Ministry?

When I first started full-time Children’s Ministry, I had a pretty narrow view of what children’s ministry was. In my mind it was all about the Children’s Church service. Sure, I had other programs I was over (Rangers, Missionettes, JBQ, etc.) but they were just the side show to my three-ringed circus. Therefore when it came time to name my department, I naturally went with the name of the kids church. JAM City became JAM City Children’s Ministries.

Not a big deal right? Maybe not, but I soon realized that without intending too, I had set the ministry I was directly involved in as the most important program in the department… and the cost of demeaning the role of the other groups. It took me a couple of years to realize this fact… and for the feelings of my program leaders to get to me. They felt that all I cared about was “my” ministry… and everyone else got whatever was left over. This was my wake up call.

I needed a way to quickly get the point across that things were going to be changing. So along with making myself more available and getting more involved, I made another small change that made a big difference. I renamed the Children’s Department. JAM City Children’s Ministries became The Kids Life Department. I kept JAM City name for kids church only. What did this do? It was a neutral name that showed no preference to any particular program, and it equalized all of the ministries. After all, each program fulfills an equally important role in the spiritual development support we provide to our families.

• Sunday School provides the raw materials.
• Children’s Church is about fellowship and life application.
• Mid-Week Programs are typically about mentoring and teamwork.

The renaming didn’t work miracles… but it was the first step in a process. Now that I’m in a new position, I’m going to be changing the name again. Kid’s City Children’s Ministries will become Suncoast Kids Department, the first step in unifying our volunteer staff and leaders and letting them know that they are valuable and valued.

I met my new church today. I was a little worried to be honest. Here I’d moved my family halfway across the country from Kansas City to St. Pete, Florida to work as the Children’s Pastor for a church I’d never even been to. I say I was worried… but honestly, I wasn’t. Two reasons:

1. God has worked out so much and made this move so obviously a part of His will I knew this would be no different.

2. The leadership of this church is what attracted me here. They could have been handling snakes and I would have been okay. (That last part is a lie… but almost not.)

After service there was a Children’s Ministry luncheon prepared to introduce me to the lay staff. I shook a lot of hands, met a lot of great folks and forgot a whole mess of names… though I do recall that two girls who were named after Disney Princesses and a dude named Nathan with a very happy Dad.

I wasn’t prepared to say anything… but I was asked and so I walked to the front. I didn’t feel like telling them about where I had worked, how hardcore it was, how many folks I’d had working with me or any of that. The things that were burning in my heart to share were…

1. This ministry does not need me to fix it.

It’s a healthy ministry where kids are growing and being taken care of. I’m not here to fix something that’s broken, but rather to nurture and direct the growth that is already happening.

2. I can tell instantly that you are good people with great hearts.

I don’t usually talk like this… but there was a healthy, family, friendly spirit in the room. I’m sure I’ll bump heads with someone in there eventually… but they seemed eager to accept my family and hit the road running!

3. I want to honor the work you’ve all done by learning what you do.

These folks have recently said goodbye to a CP and then held down the fort for at least nine weeks waiting for us to arrive. I’m not going to barge in and ignore the hard work they’ve put in. I’m sure we won’t be doing it exactly the same 3-6 months from now… but I’ll bet I’ll enjoy the things they do as much as they enjoy the tricks I have up my sleeve.

All in all… it was a fantastic day. (Except for the part where I told the staff that I had prepared a rap for them.) It was cool seeing the church as just another person before I have to go in and be Pastor James. It allowed me to see things from a first-timer’s perspective (which is a very hard thing to do later on) and let me experience the worship service without pressure.

Tomorrow morning I start my first week in the office. Woo hoo!

God has called my family and myself to a Children and Family ministry position in Florida from Kansas City. This month’s CMMonthly is my farewell sermon delivered in just under 10 minutes. Ten things I learned from 10 years of ministry at Sheffield.

I have been at Sheffield Family Life Center in Kansas City, Missouri for the past 10 years. Two of those were as an intern, but the past 8 years I have been involved in full time ministry for youth and children.

November 8th, 2009 will mark my last Sunday at Sheffield. I have taken a position at a church in St. Petersburg, Florida.

Why the move? Family mostly. Jenn and I have felt a ‘stirring’ for a while now. I’ve even told folks I felt like a major life change was coming… but didn’t have a clue what it would be. Jenn and I finally decided to sit town and ask God what the deal was. We started with putting together a 5 year plan for our family. I asked Jennifer where she saw us in 5 years… the first thing out of her mouth was, “I want to raise our children around family”.

I guess I had known that she had a leaning toward her folks. There had been quite a bit of travel back and forth since the kids had shown up. But this was the first time she’d just laid it out.

We prayed about it, wrote out our list, and told God that though we were making plans, it was His that we truly wanted. God rarely speaks to me directly… so we committed to two things:

We’re Moving Slow – We gave God plenty of time to let us know if we were moving the right direction. We literally prayed, “God we ask for brick walls if we’re moving the wrong way… but we look forward to mile markers of conformation if we’re headed the right way.”

We’re not going to make any decisions that we’re not willing to unmake in an instant – Though we make our own plans… we do not put our trust in our own decisions. At any point in this journey that God leads differently, we’re ready to change direction in a moment.

There were a couple of brick walls. They typically hurt when you hit them… but if you’re moving slow… not so much. Eventually after every networking resource I had in Georgia, North Carolina and Florida dried up… I got an email from a Pastor in St. Petersburg. We talked, really hit it off and the next thing I knew I was in Florida for two days of interviews.

Long story short… we’re packing up the house and moving to Florida for the next chapter of our life. The job is everything I’ve wanted. The location is everything Jenn wanted. It’s a wonderful gift from God.

Though it’s a little heartbreaking to leave the kids and folks at Sheffield, I know that they are in God’s loving hands… and that He will send someone along to replace me that will be so great that they’ll make me look like dirty dish water by comparison.

So, reader. Have you ever changed churches? Do you have any tips? Post them, or any other thoughts, in the comments.

They say the average youth or children’s minister stays in a position about three years. Leaving a ministry position is apparently a common part of our ministry lives. Though I never planned on joining the statistic… my family and I have accepted a position at a church in St. Petersburg, Florida and will be moving from Kansas City in two weeks.

My wife and I have felt for about a year that we’ve been waiting for something but we didn’t know what. Apparently God was preparing our hearts for a transition. Though we weren’t planning to go anywhere, we committed ourselves to prayer and found that God had released us and was calling us elsewhere. I’m pleased to say that we’re leaving on great terms… no drama to report. Our primary reason for the move is to be closer to family. This has become very important to us since we’ve had children.

Once a few years ago, I was going through a pretty dark time in my life. No moral failure or anything like that… I was just “going through” as they say. I was feeling as if I wanted to be done with ministry… that I wanted to leave… to get away from the pressure. I talked to a mentor of mine and he gave me some sound advice that I wanted to share in this context. He asked me to recall when God called me to my current position. I was instantly able to remember that moment. He said, “When it’s time to go, He’ll release you the same way. He called you here… he’ll call you away.” His words really clarified things for me. I realized that leaving wasn’t my choice to make. I remained faithful… and God was good.

So when is it time to leave? When God says. It makes all the difference. On those bad days in ministry sometimes the Call is the only thing that keeps you hanging in there. Knowing that in spite of all of our shortcomings and flaws, that you know that you know that God put you where you are can give us the strength we need to hold on. I’m finding that I need that same assurance as I transition between seasons in ministry. Thank God I have it. I know my future is secure, in spite of all of the unknowns, because we’re following the path that has been laid out for us by our Heavenly Father.

Those of you who may be struggling where you are… I would urge you to remember that moment God called you to be where you are. If you want to leave, ask… but wait for that call to go before you throw in the towel. God still had a lot of work to do on me that would have not been possible if I had left before. If he doesn’t release you it’s because he has unfinished work to do in your life and the lives you minister to. Trust that.

Most of us write up and use pretty basic rules for Children’s Church: Don’t talk, keep your hands to your self, participate, limit bathroom use, blah, blah blah. I’m finding that those just aren’t cutting it these days. There are so many issues that the basic rules just don’t cover. I suggest we add the following to our policies and procedures manuals immediately!

Rules I Wish I Could Use:

For Kids

• You shall not turn your Sunday School papers into airplanes or roll them into weapons.
• If we have drums, you are not allowed to play them. Ever. If you do we will cancel your next birthday.
• Do not groan after my movie video clip illustration is over.
• The answer to every question I ask is not “God”.
• Please thank your parents on our behalf for buying you a cell phone… right after you tell them you lost it.
• Knock, knock jokes are banned for life.
• Understand this: Even though I don’t have your birthday and age memorized… I still love you!
• Please tell your friends we have bibles and coats here at the church… free gifts from all of you who have left yours here.
• Nobody stole your socks.
• Please stay completely still and quiet during worship but move around and talk as much as you want during the sermon.
• Prayer requests are not a chance to tell a story.
• If your grandmother is dead… there’s really no reason to pray for her… again.
• Offering goes in the plate… not in the coke machine after service.
• Please explain to we leaders how you fit all that stuff in that tiny pink purse.
• Keep your dangum shoes on girls!

For Parents

• Parent’s are required to get angry when they arrive late for check-in. We’re only open for an hour after all… only 30 minutes shorter than the service itself… I’d be angry too!
• Parent’s must pick up their children within 15 minutes of the end of service. Those who don’t will have their children given to someone who will raise them properly.
• Deadlines apply to everyone… except you. You’re special.
• Please don’t act like you’re doing us a favor my dropping off your child. It’s not a problem for me… but some of these folks feel a little under appreciated when you act that way.
• By all means, fill up a van full of kids, bring them to church and then refuse to volunteer!
• Offering goes up one dollar for every minute you are late to church.
• Those papers we send home… they’re useful… and not just as replacement floor mats in the minivan.
• I know your kid is perfect… like you… but we still need him to stop stabbing others.
• Thanks for your donation… but the homeless don’t like cans of pepper hulls either.

For Volunteers

• If you’ve been sick since Wednesday, please wait to call in till Saturday night or (even better) Sunday morning just before service. For a bonus, do it via facebook!
• Children’s Ministry is probably not the best place to work off your community service hours.
• You can pass a background check… but if you smell funny, I’m not going to approve you to work with kids. It’s called mercy.
• Volunteers who call in sick for the Super Bowl will have the kids from their abandoned class delivered to their home in time for the game.
• Yes, random church member with an agenda, I’d love to create a class wrapped around your goat farm.
• Please hold all important, drama-filled conversations until right before service starts. Preferably while I’m trying to get PowerPoint to work.
• All scary looking relatives of yours are automatically cleared to sit through kids church. Since you asked me with them standing right there so I couldn’t say no. I’ll be sure to send a couple of mine over to watch you sleep tonight in return.
• If you’re going to read right out of the curriculum, at least hold the book right-side up.

Do you have any of your own rules we should add? Put them in the comments!

Over the last ten years I’ve been in full-time ministry, most of that in children’s ministry, I’ve found myself repeating a few phrases over and over. The title of this post is one of them: “Don’t make permanent changes for temporary situations”.

Though I’ve never had a paid ministry assistant, over the years I have had several volunteer folks who have helped to fill that role. Almost without exception, in the first few months, they would come to me with a situation and a solution… and I would find myself repeating that same phrase. Let me give you an example of what I’m talking about, then I’ll explain why it’s not a good idea.

John was one of my newer volunteers but he was a natural and due to his willingness and availability had become someone I relied on quite a bit. After a few months I had placed him as coordinator over our Sunday evening program for elementary. He came to me one night with a situation… our attendance had dropped over the last two weeks. He proposed that we move the entire program to a different set of rooms that were smaller. What he didn’t know or realize was that every year around this time we had the same dip in attendance but always picked back up. He also didn’t know that if we gave up our rooms, other ministries would be glad to make use of them and we’d never get them back. He wanted to fix a temporary situation with a permanent solution.

Here are the hoops my situations have to jump through before I consider a permanent solution:

1. Is it consistent?

Before I make a new policy or a major change I want to make sure it’s not an isolated incident. I’m not going to make a new policy because one child was left late after a program… but if a month of Sunday’s goes by and I’ve got three or four families consistently abusing our workers by picking up super late… I’m going to write up a policy.

2. Is there history I’m not aware of?

For any situation you come across… someone in your church has seen it before and has dealt with it. Typically the Pastor or another staff member who has been there longer knows something you don’t. In my situation with John, he didn’t know how many years we had worked to outgrow the other set of rooms… I wasn’t about go backwards just because of an annual dip in attendance!

3. Am I Acting or Reacting?

Some situations seem bigger than they really are. We all get sick children in our ministries from time to time… but with swine flu running amok, we’re tempted to go nuts and treat every kid with a sniffle like they’ve got the plague. I always want to be sure that I’m not just reacting to the high-pressure of a temporary situation. In the heat of the moment, especially when dramatic people are involved, it can be tempting to start churning out changes and new policies until the storm passes. Making choices based on fear, feelings and self-protection is never a good idea. Sure, you solve the immediate issues, but later you have to deal with the consequences of choices made in haste. Does the situation warrant a huge change? Usually your common sense will serve you better than a policy. Urge your volunteers to look at the big picture. Keep existing policies and procedures in mind and use common sense.

We can easily get drama-happy… where we want to make big deals out of simple issues so that we can feel like we’re doing something important. Drama is not ministry. Ministry is what we do after the drama is quickly and graciously dealt with.

There are differing opinions on the level of excitement and fun that should be used in children’s church. Some would say that it should be filled with video clips, sound effects, games, object lessons and fun. Others would fight against such things by proposing we train children to be able to handle big church by giving them their own version of an adult-like service.

I find myself falling into a different category if you can call it a category at all. I think each church has to decide for itself what atmosphere it provides based on the requirements of their congregation. Even then I don’t believe that you can set the bar and walk away. My own services have changed over the years, going from one extreme at times to the other, based on what my kids needed at the time. Sometimes even within the same service.

I have an unwritten rule that I use to gauge the amount of ‘fun’ I use in my services. I often share this with my kids as a way to improve their behavior if we’re having a ‘full moon’ Sunday. Every week we make a deal:

If you promise to learn, I promise to make it fun.

There are times when fun makes the learning go smoothly. There are other times I have to rein it in in order to get my point across. I find that I have to keep part of my mind on the message… and the other part out there in the crowd. If the one part isn’t receiving what the other part is sending, it’s time to change things up. Right there… on the fly.

Sometimes fun works. Sometimes fun looks serious, like a secret club meeting in the back yard. Sometimes it’s not about fun at all… but about interest in the topic. Mostly it’s about where your kids are and what they need. Here’s the other guideline I heard somewhere:

A child’s experience with the content is as important as the content.

If you can’t get it in their heads somehow, it doesn’t really matter how good of a point your making. I refuse to slot my children’s church into a ‘fun’ or ‘church-like’ category because doing so would limit the methods I need to use to get the Word out. My hope would be that other Children’s Ministers would keep their options open as well. It doesn’t always have to be a playground… or a funeral.

Due to my schedule this week, I’m not on my usual (nearly) daily blogging schedule… but I wanted to just share a little of what I’m experiencing from God right now. My hope is that it will lift you up.

I really feel like God loves me right now.

I always know he does… but we live in a world that makes that fact a little less than obvious sometimes. Knowing God loves me has carried me through a lot of rough times. Trusting and believing that He has my best in mind… that He’s out there watching over me… that He will never leave or forget about me… those things keep me going on and standing as strong as I can. But that being said, it’s nice to have the feeling once in a while too.

I’ve never been very touchy-feely with God. My childhood taught me that you can’t trust your feelings. So I trusted in hard facts about God. That was safe… ultimately I suppose they took less faith to believe in as well, but I digress. I obviously over compensated, as we adults often do, and so rather than the sensible thing, experiencing feelings but not making life changing decisions based on them, I grew to despise them. They were something for weaker Christians… I didn’t need them. I was almost proud of the fact that I didn’t need to FEEL God in order to believe in Him.

But it got lonely.

I feel the love of my wife. My children are both crazy about me… I love the way that makes me feel. Feelings are awesome… so I really wasn’t opposed to them… only when it came to the spiritual side of things. I wish I had more to write down at this point… but now we’re caught up to the current day… and I’m totally blown away with the amount of love that God, my Father, has expressed to my family.

You know how you feel when someone gives you the perfect gift? A gift that shows that shows you how well they know you? It may not even be very expensive… or maybe it’s even handmade… but the sentiment behind the gift makes it priceless. Have you ever cried after opening something at a birthday or Christmas? I have (it was a Buzz Lightyear watch)… but this gift that God is giving to us is so personal, so perfect, so spot-on… it simply blows my mind. It truly feels like a dream. Unreal.

God’s love feels good for a change. It’s nice.

Let’s be honest, sometimes His love hurts. It urges us to grow and go to places we’re not comfortable going. It shines the light of Truth into the dark corners of our souls… places where ugly things hide. It’s not fun being broken and rebuilt for His use. It doesn’t feel good. I guess I thought that’s all there was. Maybe I was just really screwed up and needed a lot of extra work. Maybe I just fought it and hurt myself. Who cares.

God, thank you for your amazing love. I’ve always had it… but thanks for making it feel so good this time. *tears*

How do we deal, as children’s ministers, with a lack of pastoral support?

Resources:

• http://inflateaset.com
• http://kids.woot.com
• My Preaching Video

I’m interested in what you do (or don’t do) for Halloween. So let’s flip the script here today and you tell me something.

What are you doing this year for your kids & community for Halloween?

Leave your responses in the comments.

I’ve written about Children’s Ministry names before, but that was more of a post about the types of names. This time I’m just going to punch out a list of names for Children’s Church right off the top of my head. I cannot confirm or deny if any of these are original or in use somewhere. These are simply offered out of a desire to help those who are searching for Children’s Ministry Names.

Kid Works – A construction or science theme.

InTune – Music or computer theme.

Megaville – City or superhero theme.

JAM City – Jesus And Me, a city theme.

ChurchName Kids – Put your church’s name and add kids to the end. It works.

Xtreme – Extreme sports theme.

Power House – Electricity or explosion themed.

Young Adventures – Explorer themed.

City Kids or Kid City – City themes.

NRG Zone

Power Source

Sonshine Kidz

Kids Life

Sincity – Just checking to see if you’re reading this.

Kids for Christ

Kids Trek

Disciple Ship – Nautical theme.

Volunteer Seekers – Sorry.

Kids Place

Kid Nation

UpStreet

Kidz Zone

Kid Builders

Camp Kingdom

Kid Power

Kid Planet

Action Kids

Big Steps

iKids

180 Crew

KidStyle

Kids in Training

BootCamp

Camp Rock

TNT

Impact

Christ’s Kids

Young Champions

Submitted by @PerryLyons

Kidsmin

KidsChristClass

Kids for Christ

His Little Ones

Christaloneians

Tykes for Christ

FYI – The logo above was done by me for a Children’s Pastor via my website http://drawyouapicture.com. If you need a low-cost children’s ministry logo, check it out.

What do you do when someone you depended on quits Children’s Ministry? Maybe it’s a top level coordinator or just someone who said they would do music for VBS. The job they were going to do doesn’t matter… the fact that you’re not stuck with it, or unable to do the program because of it, is. It can be easy to panic when you get those emails or phone calls. I’ve recently had this happen to me. It changes things, but I’ll adjust and eventually have the same outcome. I guess that’s the point after all.

Here are some tips for dealing with big jobs that get abandoned.

1. Don’t Panic

This is not a choice you can make just after you’re disappointment happens. This is a choice you make today… before anything goes haywire. Are you going to be a person of action… or reaction? I don’t know about you, but I want to be in control of what comes out of my mouth… and though it’s true that no one can tame the tongue… you can control where the tongue is speaking from. If your heart is focused on the One you live to serve, if you realize who is in control, that heart will overflow out of your mouth when the time comes. Make the choice today to not panic.

2. Don’t Burn Bridges

Like Moses said, “Let your people go!”… kinda. You may be angry, hurt, upset, disappointed… but let them go easy! You’re going to have a ton of feelings toward them… none of them will be good ones. None of them will be based on anything other than what you think they’ve done to you. You can’t base decisions on bad thinking. So make your choice now… when they call or email… let them off easy. I always make a point to let them know that the door swings both ways, in a positive sense. They’re welcome back anytime! I can count on two hands the number of volunteers I’ve gotten back because I gave them a guilt free exit.

3. Trust Your Real Source

Both step one and step two rely on step 3 to work. You’ve got to realize where your help comes from. It’s not a volunteer, your spouse or your pastor… not even in yourself. Your help comes from the Lord (creator of Heaven and Earth). Also, it’s HIS ministry, HIS kids, His church, HIS passion and therefore HIS responsibility. Trust that God has a plan to work everything out for your good and HIS glory. Pray to the Lord of the harvest to send you laborers… it’s HIS harvest field… if he wants it harvested, he’ll have to send you folks to help! He does and He will.

4. Think Outside Your Circle

Okay, so the spiritual stuff is good… but what about the help you need? God helps those who help themselves right? Maybe. I prefer to say that we do what we can do and God does what we can’t. If you’re like me, you’ve tapped about just about everyone you know. It may be time to think outside your circle. Pray a bit and ask God to open your mind to someone who may have the right skill set to do what you need done. Ask them directly, letting them know what skills attracted you to them. Offer a limit to their service… say, three months. Tell them they can visit before they commit. If they bite, awesome, if not… keep praying until God delivers.

Trials like this are never fun. They’re one of the more frustrating things you’ll deal with in ministry. But like any struggle, you can just go through it… or you can go through it and have God’s purpose work in you as a result. You’re going to go through it anyway… might as well do it God’s way and get some benefits!

Two different children acting out in two different ways sparked the idea for this post today. One was a 3rd grade boy on our Rangers class… the other was my 1.5 year old son. They both were acting out in ways that were unusual for them… and because it was unusual… grace was given.

My son, or “Dunder” as we call him, was having a rough day yesterday. He was crying uncontrollably any time his Mom walked away from him. He was sensitive, whiny and just all around bad… but in a weird way. Just when we were about to pack him in a box and ship him away we theorized that he may be teething and gave him some baby Tylenol. His behavior improved within the hour. The boy was in pain apparently.

Later that evening at our Wednesday church services I was brought a couple of young men who had exchanged blows while picking up the game room for pre-class worship time. I listened to the excuses and issued my standards. I told them I’d be talking to their parents and that I wanted to be able to tell them that the boys had been good the rest of the evening. I told them to sit separately and go back into worship. One of the two was crying uncontrollably the entire time… which was unlike him… but I figured he was just upset I was talking to his parents.

Later that evening I got a call from his teacher. He was causing problems in class and was refusing to sit in time out. I was ready to put the fear of God in this kid. I was going to lay down the law and be absolutely sure he knew that he could not act this way in class and expect to get away with it. I was going to call the parents out from church… and possibly read them the riot act as well.

I had the child meet me out in the hall with the teacher… I felt my heart soften toward the boy. Kids who cause two sets of problems in same night, who don’t do it every week, are probably going through something. I asked him what the trouble was tonight. He looked to the ground and said that he hadn’t slept well the night before. I now noticed how red his eyes were. The boy was exhausted! No wonder he was acting out.

All of my plans flew out the window… grace for his situation came in it’s place. I told him that even when he’s sleepy he needs to make good choices. That while I was still going to talk to his parents, I didn’t want to add to it that he wasn’t obeying his teachers. I told him that he would go back into class and service his time… but that he could lay his head on the table for the rest of class if he wished to rest.

I tend to be a person who sticks tightly to the rules and policies… and this serves me well most of the time. But I always run the risk of doing so blindly, with little consideration to the people involved. My prayer is that God will help me and those like me to always be ready to forget what they deserve and be ready to give the grace that He has shown me so often.

I believe in cutting my Sunday Children’s Church Service into segments of no more than 10-15 minutes each. One of the ways I do that is by sticking one or two games in to the mix. My games are not just distractions… I use them as an excuse to reiterate the main point of the service. In other words, my games are quick, simple, and themed.

Quick

No matter what our game is we only play it for 60 seconds. My game person chooses the children in advance during the service (watching to see who is being good and choosing at random from that group) and let’s them know when to come up and how to play. When she gets on stage, she calls up the kids she’s already chosen, briefly explains what’s about to happen to the crowd (the gamers already know) and then it’s Mark, Set, GO! Sixty seconds later the game is over, a point is made and prizes and points are given. Then it’s on to the next segment.

Simple

Almost every single one of our stage games follows this formula: “How many (or much) ___________ can you ___________ in 60 seconds?”

This formula helps us keep games simple and quick. Here are some examples of games we’ve done this way:

• How many cotton balls can you collect…
• How many Frisbee’s can you toss through a hoop…
• How much soda can you drink…
• How many puzzle pieces can you put together…
• How many Lego’s can you stack…

Even when we don’t stick to the formula, we still keep it simple and quick.

Themed

There is no reason games should be ‘burn time’ where the kids aren’t learning. It’s simple enough to theme the games after something in the lesson or Bible story. For instance, the cotton ball game above could be used when talking about Manna. Frisbee tosses are for talking about sin and missing the target. Putting puzzles together are good for illustrating how God heals broken hearts. We’ve stacked Lego’s when we’ve talked about God being a strong tower.

The game’s theme isn’t going to be obvious unless your game leader points it out. We typically do this before and after the game. It goes something like this, “Since we’re talking about Manna today, we’re going to practice picking up a bit of Manna ourselves!” Then after the game, “You guys and girls did great picking up that Manna! This game reminds me that God will always provide what we need the same way God provided for His people in the wilderness.”

What stage game tips do you have? Leave them in the comments below. We’d love to hear from you.

What’s in a name? For some people, quite a bit, especially when it comes to their children’s ministry. Some consider the selection of the name to be on the same level as their mission statement. Some go for something that sounds super fun. Still others keep it simple and pattern their name after the Big Church’s name. No matter where you fall, a name for your children’s ministry or children’s church is an important decision. Let’s look at the different kinds of names.

The Acrostic

Though this style of name has lost some of it’s popularity, giving meaning to every letter in a particular word is still a popular choice. I recently saw a Nursery called F.R.O.G.s which meant that they were Fully Relying On God. Maybe a bit much for babies to achieve (or is it)… but all the same… that’s what they went with.

My own children’s church uses a version of this. JAM City is a place where Jesus And Me get together. It’s far from a mission statement… but it clarifies each week why we come to church.

The only downside of this is sometimes trying to find meaningful words for each letter can be limiting. I’ve seen some pretty strange things come of trying to make something fit in just the right way. Just be sure not to compromise your mission or message because of a name limitation.

The Spiritual Name

Personally, these are my least favorite types of kids church names. This is mostly due to my spiritual background… most of the churches I went to were long on charisma and short on real spiritual depth. So disregard my opinion if this is your cup of tea. To those going with this style of name, I would urge them to keep the balance between the spiritual depth and the fun of learning. A child’s experience with your message is just as important as the message. If we do not make the message attractive, applicable and yes, fun… they will typically not receive the message in the first place. So go with Spiritual Warriors of God if you want… just make being a Spiritual Warrior is practical and fun.

The Theme Name

For many ministers, their name determines their theme. Unless you’re tied to your theme… you need to be careful. My own kids church name is guilty of this. JAM City dictates that our theme will always be a city, but I’m good with this. I’ve used it for 8 years now and have found the city theme to be very flexible. City’s can have parades, celebrations, conflicts, new construction, fairs, struggles, storms and just about anything you can imagine.

I’ve seen ministries named after Movie Studios, Jungles, Water or Oceans, Space and even Power Companies. With these types of names, I’m a fan of restricting it to just the children’s church. The Children’s Ministry, on the other hand, can have a different name that is broad and can include all of the ministries of the department.

The Practical Name

For some churches, simple is better. They like names that simply give it to you straight. Names like Kids Church (sometimes with a ‘z’) or Children’s Church. It may not be very creative… but it gets the point across. There’s no question what the ministry is about.

I’m a fan of using the practical name in publications for visitors and on the church website. Visitors will not know what PowerSource is… is it a healing service, youth service, single’s ministry or what? So I always lead with Children’s Church… then put the ministry name in the description.

The Church Name

Sometimes you’ll see the church’s name or theme as the driving force behind a name selection. Sheffield Kids (or with a ‘z’) is a perfectly acceptable name. I know of a youth ministry from a church with a water-type name… so their youth group is called Surge with a huge wave as their logo. These types of names are great because they have a built-in connection to the church and yet allow for limitless themes and such. Sheffield Kids (or with a ‘z’) can have a sub-title that introduces the theme of the year (or eon).

Choosing a name is an important step… but personally there is no best style of name. Whatever works for your church is the best. If you see a name you like that’s already in use… and it’s not copyrighted… use it! I know for a fact we’re not the only JAM City out there. The important thing to remember is that a name is just a title. It is not an edge or an advantage. It will not guarantee success. That’s not a title’s job. Your ministry will define the title… not the other way around.

Any children’s minister with policies will eventually have one of those policies ignored or transgressed against. Calling a volunteer to ask over it is never fun or easy. Correcting one of our kids is easy. Correcting an adult, even better an adult that is older than ourselves, can be downright awkward or even embarrassing for everyone involved.

Over the years I’ve have to call plenty of volunteers to the carpet. Most have been more than willing to be corrected and move forward but once in a while it turns into a fiasco. Sometimes because of the personality of the volunteer… and sometimes because I go into the meeting half prepared.

Here are some things I need to remember for next time.

1. Do not operate on assumptions or rumors.

Assume the best about the person. Better to be proven wrong than to treat them poorly because of misinformation.

2. Keep focused on one goal at a time. One correction per meeting.

You may have a lot of things to cover… but if you throw to much at them they’ll think you hate them. The people are more important than the policy.

3. Write an agenda. Stick to it.

Write up what your goal is and work your way back from there. Each bullet is a correction. Sprinkle it with compliments.

4. Make sure your goal is to improve the minister not just the ministry.

Your real goal will come through in your conversation. If it’s pure, it will cover a multitude of mistakes.

5. Understand there is the Truth, your perception of the truth and their perception of the truth.

Assume they have a different view of the subject than you. Listen. Try to understand.

6. Pray.

Before, during, after. It helps everything.

7. Follow up after.

Even just a text full of praise and thanks for the volunteer’s willingness to change can help put out the fires that often spring up after a meeting.

This is great! Enjoy!

This month we’re talking about dealing with confronting children, parents and volunteers in potentially confrontational situations.

I have a Marriage & Family podcast/blog/webcomic over at GeekLovesNerd.com. I do (almost) daily writings on issues that matter to married couples, parents and to those hoping to be in a marriage some day. It’s fun.

I wanted to share a series I’m doing on Proper Discipline. It’s basically the same stuff you can get from the Proper Discipline Audio Series I did here on CMMonthly a while back… but in print format… and for parents rather than the classroom.

I’d love your input and feedback!

Proper Discipline [via Geek Loves Nerd]

You often see articles on how to avoid burnout in ministry… but what about when it sneaks up on you? How can you get out of the hole of despair your in? Below I’ve listed some things that help me when the well doing makes me weary.

5. Time Away – but not necessarily

Taking time off if you haven’t had a break can be a great way to recharge… but not always. Sometimes taking a break can be like running away. If you don’t do things to recharge in your time away, you’ll end up coming back right into the same situations as ill prepared as you were before.

4. Act Your Way Into Feelings

I’m not talking about faking a good mood… though we’ve all been there. That would be an attempt to feeling your way into actions… which is killer. Acting your way into feelings means that you get up, get out there and keep on trucking. If you can’t do everything you’re supposed to do, do what you can do. Give God room to move in your ministry life by continuing to do as much of it as you can. The rest of the steps depend on this.

3. Change Things Up

Most of the time we’re not burned out on ministry as a whole… we’re just burned out on parts of it. It may be time for a change in those areas. I’m a fan of giving away parts of the ministry that grind my nerves away to those who are especially gifted at it. Even if you don’t delegate everything… doing it differently can be just the thing to renew your interest and passion.

2. Ask For Help

We get burned out when we try to do more than we can handle. Sure, there are things God has called us to do that may be beyond us and all… but His yoke is easy and all that. I’m talking about when we take on to much and try to do it all ourselves. It’s time to delegate. Don’t know how? Try asking yourself, “Who would take my place if I were sick this Sunday?” and go from there. You don’t have to give everything away… just the parts that anyone else can do.

1. Pray Through

As a child I would hear people talk about ‘praying through’. I didn’t understand it then… but I sure do now. Praying through, for me anyway, is praying until my attitude changes. Literally bugging God until He helps me through. Typically for me it means Him humbling me and realizing it was some sort of independent pride that got me where I was in the first place. Along with seeking energy, attitude adjustments and such, you might also ask for creativity… or if you’re season has changed. God loves you more than the ministry you provide. He knows that you minister out of your overflow… and He will fill you if you wait on Him.

5. Remember their name.

For me, this is a huge problem. I’m terrible with names across the board. I carry my drivers license so I can prove who I am… to myself. Nametags are great… but learning the names of your kids (other than the ‘bad’ ones) is huge. Remembering them after their out of children’s ministry is even better.

4. Tell on them to their parents when they’ve been extra good.

Sometimes in the chaos of a Sunday good behavior can be taken for granted. The last thing we want is our parents to start rolling their eyes when we approach them. Start telling on your kids when they’ve been caught being good. It’ll help you stay positive and the kids will love you for it.

3. Eat lunch with them at school and meet their Teacher(s).

With permission from a parent or guardian I have never had a problem getting in to eat lunch with one of my kids. I usually show up a bit early so I can meet the Teacher, see the classroom and most importantly, their own desk. This is especially good for your ‘bad’ kids. You might be surprised how good they are in school… or how they’ve improved since Kindergarten.

2. Get yourself invited to eat dinner at their home.

This is easy. Just ask the kids to bug their parents. You’ll get invites! It’s an excellent way to get into a family’s life. Have mom and the child give you a tour of the home and see the kid’s room. Remember a few things and mention them from the stage the next week. Watch their face.

1. Call them on their birthday.

A postcard is great… but a phone call on the day (or even the week) of their birthday has a greater effect on children and families than any other single thing I have ever done. If you have a small group, you’re probably looking at 2-6 calls a month. Put them in your planner and remember to check. Make weekend calls on Friday. Make Sunday calls in person with hug.

Last night was a trying evening for me. Most of the parents we serve a awesome, grateful and accommodating… but the mom I dealt with last night was none of those. I don’t know what got to me most… her behavior or the way I responded to it.

In a nutshell, she had three children. One was nursery age. The Nursery was full so she tried to sneak her newly-turned three year old into an older class without checking in. I stepped in and corrected the situation. Mom was angry and started talking trash.

Here are some things I learned that will help me deal with this type of person in the future.

1. You can’t reason with them.

They know what they want. They want to be rid of their child. This type of person wouldn’t care if they were dropping their child off at a homeless shelter… they just want what they want. Don’t waste your time trying to appease them if you can’t give them what they want. Just like a troll on a forum, it just gives them more of a platform to spew anger.

2. Trust your policies and procedures.

These folks will lie… they will tell you their way had been done before… that everything was fine last time… that you told them such-in-such. Though you’ll want to believe them… trust your people. Trust that they followed the policies and procedures until you’ve spoken to them and learned otherwise. Do not assume your volunteers have disregarded everything you’ve taught them just because one person says differently.

3. You can’t serve everyone.

I have a huge heart for people. I hate it when I’m put in the place of looking like a bad guy… but that’s not my role unless someone is behaving in a way that forces me to squash that behavior. My ministry has the potential of being a great resource and help to families… but if someone is unwilling to follow simple, basic policies… they are rejecting all of that. The part that kills me is that they don’t even know what they’re missing. I understand that people have issues… but Children’s ministry functions within a set of rules. Those rules are not just for fun… they’re for the protection of the folks we’re ministering to… and those who are ministering. When we have someone who can’t do the basics of following procedure… well, there are plenty of churches out there who have more heart than sense… they can go to church there.

4. Did they have a point?

After all of the drama and bad behavior I still need to ask myself… Did they have a point? Was there something we missed? If I don’t ask that question and attempt to answer it seriously, I risk being a ministry who believes they have ‘arrived’. We always have room to grow and improve. In this case I realized that if we’d simply had enough workers in the Nursery, there would have been no issue at all. I understand at least part of the frustration my parent felt.

What would you add to this list? Share you insights in the comments.

I met a few friend from Daytona Beach, Florida yesterday. He’s a Children’s Pastor with a lot of creativity… but not a lot of space. He shares his children’s ministry room with other ministries just like I do. He got tired of moving heavy sets each week and decided to do something about it.

The product of that need was something he calls Inflate-A-Set. It’s a super portable, light weight set frame that inflates like a moon walk but works like a rear screen and puppet stage.

I’m going to be saving my pennies to get me one. It’s exactly what I’ve been looking for!

They’ve just got a business card style site up for now… but it’ll give you something to look at.

Inflate-A-Set

This weekend we recorded our JAM City children’s church service using four cameras and an portable audio recorder. I spent most of Sunday afternoon and all day Monday putting it all together and editing it down. The result is a 56 minute video cut into 10 minute segments available for your viewing pleasure on YouTube.

No set. No fancy lighting. No amazing costumed characters. Just a bunch of passion and a great group of kids (it was a ‘rain Sunday’ so not even a large group of kids).

I’ve edited out a lot of our more fun segments to focus on the ministry portions… but I plan to make those available as separate clips shortly. Stuff your missing is: Rules & Regs, Jumps, Offering, Praise & Worship, and Game Time.

If you have any questions about anything you see in the video… leave a comment below and I’ll get right back to you.

Link: JAM City Children’s Church Video

I’m a big fan of Woot.com. If you’re not familiar, it’s a site with one item for sale each day at a great price. They have a set amount for sale, and when it’s gone it’s gone. I’ve probably spent more money over at Shirt.Woot.com over the years though… same concept except with t-shirts.

As of this morning at 12:00am they’ve launched a brand new spin on the theme: Kids.Woot.com. Every day we can expect great deals on gadgets, games and toys for children. Even Woot.com has gotten into the spirit by selling a fort making kit.

I know I’ve got this added to my bookmarks. I would imagine any children’s pastor looking for great prizes for special events would find it in their best interest to check it out daily.

I wonder if Kids.Woot.com will do their own version of the BOC?

[Link]

I found a page full of free Game Show apps for use on computers for children’s ministry. The games include 25,000 Pyramid, Sale of the Century, Deal or no Deal, Family Feud, Press Your Luck, Blockbusters, Countdown, Wheel, Match Game, 1 vs 100, Million Dollar Password, Scrabble and more.

There is even a Deal or No Deal Banker’s Offer Calculator

Free Game Show Controls

I’ll admit something… I do a character. His name is JoJo The Christian Clown. I hate clowns. JoJo wrote a song for my daughter a while back and I made a video of it and shared it with the internets. Now I’m sharing it with you. It has no redeeming value at all. It will become stuck in your head and you may sing it out loud at some point today. Just a warning.

You can download the mp3 here.

And check out this Kindergarten class that performed the song for their Family Night. I just found the video last night!

If you were leaving your position in three months… and wanted to leave the ministry you’d been building in the best condition possible… what would you do in the next 30 days?

I have recently put this challenge to myself and realized I had a vision or two that I had been holding off on for no good reason. I immediately called a meeting and boldly laid out my vision and I think things are going to start moving that direction. It’s exciting.

It’s the same as when you sell your home. There are a ton of things that you suddenly realize you need to fix that you were living with and had actually grown to accept. Looking at your home through a buyers eyes helps you see things in a more honest light. This exercise can help us to light a fire under ourselves to jump on those projects, programs, tasks or whatever that we’ve gotten used to being less than what we’ve wanted them to be.

Today was a pretty rough Sunday. The kids were nuts but the worst behavior come from a few parents who were way out of line. Days like that can make you wonder why you even bother. If the parents don’t appreciate it… what’s the point?

God had a simple reminder for me:

You’re not serving them… you’re serving me.

God will never disrespect you. He never looks down on you for being a servant. He is always proud, always thrilled with your service. He is the reason we do what we do. He’s always worth working for.

I hope that sample phrase ministers to you as much as it did me. It falls into the category of things you know you know… but need to be reminded of in a fresh way once in a while.

Plus… it was only two sets of parents… not all of them.

When did children’s ministry become all about Leadership? Though I think that message appeals to the white-color, Starbucks-sipping, Mac toting children’s pastors (an observation, not a judgment)… I think the latest trend in children’s ministry is all but lost on a majority of the folks actually doing the ministry.

Most children’s ministers are unpaid untrained volunteers who have a lot of passion and ability but not a lot of ideas, support or resources. They also don’t have a budget. I think this is why the CM gurus have ignored the real need… there’s no money in it. I don’t see a lot of curriculum being created and marketed to the Inner City for instance.

The mother of 3 doing children’s ministry in the basement of the church with her husband doing puppets doesn’t need to know about leadership, time-management and budgeting. She needs to know how to create object lessons, how to discipline properly, how to stay motivated, how to work with nothing and turn it into spiritual growth in a child’s life.

My hope is that a movement will rise up. A community of mid-small church children’s ministers who are Kingdom minded enough to share what they’ve learned, what they have, what has kept them afloat. A group of folks who aren’t comparing numbers or conference appearances but may have accidently mastered some aspect of their ministry and would love to share it with the rest of us.

As MJ said… we’ve got to start with the man in the mirror… so here goes. If there is anything I can help anyone with… anything I have learned… anything I can give (that is mine to give)… please let me know. That is the goal of this site and podcast after all. To target the forgotten.

My charge to all of us: Forget about being popular. Be important.

Yesterday’s post dealt with screwing up your legacy. I spoke of a message God had given on the way to the car. This post continues that event.

I sat in my car going through all of the things I needed to stop complaining about. There was a huge list. The truth is our church is a very hard church to serve. It’s just the truth. A slide show of situations and issues flipped through my mind. Volunteers. Parents. Finances. Inequity. Drama. Politics. Failures. Disappointments. Mistakes. Broken Hearts. Things the church had done to me… things I had done to the church.

God said, “Yeah, but this is what I’ve called you to… can you do it?”

That meant to much to me.

1. He knew it was a tough job. It helped so much to have his understanding.
2. It gave purpose to the drama. God had called me to help with it.
3. He had called ME. He hadn’t been able to call some folks… apparently I was the man for the job.

I think God’s word to me is a word to us all… to those in ministry, to those in the workplace or who work to make a home. God called you! You are unique, able, enabled, and specifically gifted for the role He has given you to play.

Your church may be a world of drama. It may be the best thing in the world. The easiest place to work or not… but wherever it is… that’s what God called you to. There is a whole heap of energy in that.

I was walking from the church to the car one Sunday night a few years ago. Once again I was one of the last people to leave. The parking lot was almost empty. I’m used to the night security guys starting their cars and following me out most nights.

It had been a rough day, a rough year actually, and being the last to leave made me angry and bitter. A flood of complaints flooded into my brain. It must be nice to have a pastoral position where you’re done once church is over! I must be the only one who actually works around here!

Then suddenly I had a video play in my head. It was of me 20 years later, taking that same walk from the church to my car. Two folks were standing up on the sidewalk saying, “Look, there’s Pastor James. He’s the hardest working pastor here. Been the last to leave for over 20 years!” Then a thought came to my mind.

If you’re bitter… you’ll ruin your legacy. No one will care.

It was like a slap in the face… a much needed one. Before I even made it to my car my heart was repentant. I wish I could report that I was instantly changed. I wasn’t… but that phrase became like a rudder for my mind. Whenever I started to get bitter, it would help to steer me in the right direction.

I don’t want my sacrifices to go to waste. I don’t want my labor to give others the impression that working for God is futile and overwhelming. It only seems that way when I try to do it in my own strength.

God began to show me that there is purpose to our struggles. Especially when they don’t go away or even ease up. But we can ruin that when we complain and become jaded and embittered.

One day I want people to look at my life and be inspired to emulate it. It will be an example one way or the other. I want it to be an example to follow, not an example of how NOT to do it.

About three years ago I was in prayer and God finally spoke to me. Some people have God speak to them all the time… not me. I’ve never heard him audibly… and that really used to bother me. God typically just drops answers or thoughts into my mind. Thoughts that make so much sense I know they didn’t come from me. But that moment three years ago was different. Though He wasn’t audible, the voice in my mind was clear.

“Outlive this,” was all He said.

I had been praying because I was seeing some pretty tough times coming on the horizon in my job and home life. They issues were taking a toll on my job performance, attitude, patience and spirituality. I had been praying for guidance, answers, help of just about any kind… and all I got was two words. Outlive this.

Though I’ve since had more thoughts and impressions that I know were from God since that moment… no matter how I pray, I haven’t gotten anything more out of our Father. No matter the circumstances, I always just come back to the last thing He told me.

I’ve given this short statement a lot of thought over the years. Like a Rodeo Rider riding bareback it has become a handle for me to hold onto. Here’s what I’ve pulled from it. I hope it will be of comfort to someone out there.

“Outlive This” means a few things to me:

1. He didn’t say ‘Survive This’.

There is a huge difference between surviving something and outliving it. You can barely be alive and still say your survived. You can be totally torn to shreds and still be a survivor. That’s not what God wanted from me. He wanted me to be alive after it was all over. He didn’t want me to just get through it… but rather to learn to thrive in the midst of the complexities of my life.

2. If I was outliving something, it meant there would be an end.

The word ‘outlive’ denotes that whatever you’re outliving will die before you do. That word gave me so much hope. Yes, I was expected to thrive in adversity… but that adversity had an expiration date. It was eventually going to die… and I would still be alive… and in theory better for it. It was like God ran to the end of the tunnel and installed a little light for me. This wasn’t an open ended issue. There would be a conclusion… and I would be alive after it.

3. There was a purpose for the drama.

God knew it was coming. He gave me a handle to hold on to. He wanted me alive on the other end. There was an end in sight (though I didn’t know when it was coming). So therefore there was a plan an a purpose for this mess. What do they say? What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger. Yeah, it was something like that.

I feel that I’m approaching the end of the challenging season… yet feel another one coming on. It has been the worst yet best period of my life. I can’t say I passed it with flying colors… but I have turned out better than I was going in… and by better I mean I have learned to rely on God more than ever and realized how fragile and stupid my own thinking, meddling and attempts to control things are. I’ve moved from faith into trust with God. It’s a much better place to be.

I hope this speaks to someone.

When I was in my first year of full-time children’s ministry kids camp was a new experience for me… especially when it came time for lunch. It was very kid-centric fare featuring hamburgers, hotdogs, cold mac-n-cheese and applesauce and the like. The best part were the kid-sized portions they gave even to the famished adults. I can’t wait to tell Paul the Apostle how I suffered for Christ.

The servers were volunteers, so I made sure to be polite to them. They were serving exactly how they’d been instructed after all. I noticed that to make eye contact I was having to either stand on tip-toe or hunch down to see past a home built sneeze guard over the serving line. Every day I got a little more annoyed at this small inconvenience. I thought, Why don’t they hang this thing about two inches higher so we can see through it! Doesn’t anyone believe in excellence anymore? I know this seems ridicules… and it was… but stinky boys, unrelenting heat and little food make for an easily irritated man.

One one particular day near the end of camp as I went through the line, I noticed the kids around me getting their food. Many of them would look up and thank their server as I had done… but without ducking or toeing up. I ducked down low to their level and looked up at the servers. I had a perfect view of every face. Then it hit me…

This thing wasn’t hung for me… it was hung for them.

This became one of my core values immediately. Everything in my ministry had to be passed through that filter. To this day whenever I do anything, like set design) I will go and sit low in a chair in each major section to make sure every child can see. I don’t use cursive fonts because lower elementary can’t read them yet. I keep the lights bright in my chapel because some kids are leery of dark places… especially first time visitors.

Here are some questions I constantly ask myself:

1. Will they understand it?

2. Can they see it?

3. Are they scared of it?

4. Can they apply it?

5. Is it too long for them to pay attention?

6. Could they repeat it? Re-teach it?

7. Are they being bad, or being their age?

8. Will they get it?

9. Will they want it?

10. Will they remember it?

How do you handle head lice in Sunday School?  My husband and I are the SS directors for a small church.  We face this problem every year.  Some of the older teachers freak out when they have a child with head lice.  What is the best course of action with the teachers, child and the parents? Janel

When we’re faced with an issue that is potentially embarrassing issue we are are very honest and clear with the parents. It is always handled by myself, the children’s pastor. I state the facts (in this case head lice), letting the parent know that the child has lice… we give them information on how to clean the lice from their child… including tips on clothing, headwear, bedding, siblings etc. and in some cases offer to purchase the kit or kits.

You may find some information online and create a fact sheet and have it ready to give to parents. The key is to be compassionate, respectful and private.

As far as the response in the classroom. Teachers should be instructed possible issues such as lice. They aren’t the end of the world. They don’t attack with flaming torches and pitchforks. They can’t leap 10′s of feet through the air to infest the entire classroom in a single setting. Have them pull the child aside, explain to them the situation… tell the child to be mindful (if they are old enough) and then contact the parent (or let the child go back to class until service is over).

I have found in every sensitive situation that the best course of action is to be immediate, clear and kind. The more I try to beat around the bush, overly sensitive and mushy, the more it actually makes the family feel embarrassed and trashy.

Most of these resources you’ve probably heard of or maybe even use yourself but just in case you haven’t… here are a few online resources I use in Children’s Ministry every week.

Bible Gateway

Link: http://www.biblegateway.com

Description: Online bible with verse lookup, keyword search, topical search and multiple versions.

How I Use: I use it while on the phone to quickly find verses for specific needs or questions. During service prep it’s helpful to find the easiest to understand version of a particular verse. I also find reading a passage in multiple versions helps in my own understanding since I don’t do the Greek and Hebrew thang.

Animation Factory

Link: http://www.animationfactory.com

Description: Low-cost animated clipart, video backgrounds and PowerPoint backgrounds. The cheapest resource for full-motion animated video backgrounds online anywhere.

How I Use: This is where I get video backgrounds for the song videos we make in-house. The animated clipart also comes in handy for Jump Videos and such.

Google Images

Link: http://images.google.com/

Description: Search images that are available online (but be careful what you search for!).

How I Use: I use Google Images almost daily to find pictures to help illustrate sermon points, find photos of bible characters, images of real settings in the Holy Land. It’s also how I find images for posts on this website.

Google Docs

Link: http://docs.google.com/

Description: Online document editing and sharing suite.

How I Use: You can not only create Word-like documents online, you can share them with volunteers. If I’m working on a service with a lot of input from key volunteers, I’ll share the document with them and allow them to fill in their own service segments for review. You can also create online spreadsheets. We use one to track BGMC giving and it is shared between myself and the BGMC coordinator. I also use it to put together show notes for the CMMonthly podcasts and share it with Super Dave so he can add his own thoughts.

Gmail

Link: http://mail.google.com

Description: In my opinion the best email service on earth. Gmail is free to use and has powerful features including my favorite feature, message threading (groups emails by individual conversations).

How I Use: I’ve been using Gmail for years now. My first email dates 10/04/2004. It is the best way to stay connected to your email from any computer (or cell phone) anywhere in the world. I use it to keep my contacts organized. You can label them and group them as needed. You don’t actually have to delete your emails, you Archive them. Gmail then allows you to quickly search through your archive for any word or phrase in any part of your email, not just the subject. This has come in very handy in the past when I need to confirm sent emails or facts discussed via email from the past.

I also have 6 different Gmail accounts that are able to be funneled into my main account. When I reply, it does so as if I was logged into that particular account. This is an excellent way to keep your emails organized since I know what the topic is based off which email it was sent to (one email for each podcast, one for graphic design projects, a personal email for church and friends).

Google Groups

Link: http://groups.google.com

Description: Free email groups with extra features.

How I Use: I use Google Groups constantly. I have a separate group set up for each of my ministries as well as a master group containing every email in my department. Not only can I send out emails to everyone in a particular ministry, members of that group can also email one another. When they do, the email goes out to the entire group. So it’s like having a conversation in a room of people… but online and through email.

If I send out an announcement, and one person has a question, the question goes out to everyone in the group. I or others can answer, and the answer goes out to the entire group as well. It saves me from having to answer the same question again and again. It also allows my top-level leaders to have the same access to their workers that I do. Groups especially comes in handy when there’s a cancelation or other last minute announcement that needs to go out quickly.

One of my ministries has a separate group set up just for the parents of the children in their groups. They use it for announcements and discussions.

What do you use online?

I shared my stuff! Please share your online resources in the comments!

I’m just curious about the folks reading and contributing to CMMonthly.com.

[poll id="2"]

I’ve done a lot of blogging about delegating to volunteers this week. Now I’d like to ask for some input from you.

What parts of your ministry have you delegated?

What parts do you feel belong to you alone?

What is the biggest challenge you face with those you delegate to?

What advice do you have for others who are struggling to delegate?

Giving away parts of your ministry responsibilities is mandatory if you want a thriving, growing ministry that’s not bound by your limits and abilities. A children’s minister that is secure in their calling can allow others to develop parts of their ministry… even if that volunteer is more talented with it than we are!

If there are so many benefits to delegation… why aren’t more ministers doing it? Other than the common reasons ministers don’t delegate, I think it’s because it’s harder than doing it yourself (at first) and folks simply don’t know how to do it properly.

Delegating is harder than doing it yourself… but it’s worth it.

Training someone else to do your job may sound like a great deal. You give it away and don’t have to worry about it any more. Not true. Giving away a task means you have to train the person… and constantly evaluate what they’re doing to make sure they’re doing it correctly and improving along the way. It won’t always be harder than doing it yourself… but you’ll never want to completely walk away. The ministry is still your responsibility.

Here’s how to delegate properly.

1. They watch you do it – We must always, always, always display what we want. Folks who have never done an object lesson will never ever learn what you want in a conversation or from a manual. They need to see it in motion.
2. They help you do it – Bring them up on stage with you and have them help you. There is no time limit on any of these steps. If they need three weeks singing behind you as you lead… give it to them.
3. You help them do it – It’s a major step… but you’re still there to support and help if they need you. This is a far cry from the typical way folks are dropped head-first into children’s ministry with no training or leadership. Give your volunteers the gift you may have never had yourself.
4. You watch them do it – This is the step that never ends. Offer a lot of praise. Give constructive feedback. Keep them in the service prep loop. Make them a part of your team. This is more on you than them.

Delegating is harder than doing it yourself… but it’s more than worth it.

About 5 years ago I was not a delegator. I felt that everything to do with the main children’s service on Sunday morning had to be created, developed and delivered by me alone. That’s what they were paying me to do. I was the children’s pastor. I was doing okay.

Then came a new volunteer that I quickly gained a lot of respect for named John. He had been the son of a well-known pastor and was trying to rise into ministry on his own without relying on his father’s name. I respect that kind of thing. After a few months I asked him what he thought of the service. He said something that rocked my world forever…

“The Pastor James Show was awesome!”

I doubt he even realized how much he was saying. Not only was he pointing out that I was doing everything on stage… it suddenly sounded very prideful and self-centered. That wasn’t my heart… but as I thought and prayed through, God showed me that pride was most defiantly an element.

I almost immediately started sharing portions of my service with my volunteers. I had someone else start leading worship. I appointed a game leader. I started asking folks to come in a little early to set up the room in 15 minutes rather than the 2 hours it was taking my wife and I to do it the night before alone. I quickly realized something…

My ministry had been limited by how much I was doing.

How jacked up is that! I was working harder than ever… but because I was doing it alone… I was limiting how effective my ministry was. As I delegated more and more I found that I had more time to focus on things I didn’t even realize I wasn’t doing. Things like building relationships with parents for example. Updating policies and procedures for another.

Thinking I was the only one who could do it right was Pride.

The Pastor James Show wasn’t about the kids… it wasn’t so much about God… it was about Pastor James. I didn’t intend for that to be the case… but when people looked up there… that’s who was shining bright… me. When I started giving stuff away, and helping others become the better and better I realized something… If you succeed more than I would in my ministry… I still win. Wins don’t only come 1st hand… they come when people you disciple and developed win as well.

Doing everything means I was focused on nothing.

I wasn’t being a children’s pastor… I was being a worship leader, puppet master, stage manager, sound and video director, security coordinator, disciplinarian, game leader and more. My job was supposed to be to bring the Word… but it was only after I let go of so much that I realized how little I was actually developing a real and genuine message from God to his children. I was more focused on schedules, props, time management and such than I was on rightly dividing the Word of God. That has defiantly changed as a result of delegating.

All of the benefits didn’t happen overnight. Giving away pieces of your job isn’t easy at first… it’s actually a lot harder than doing it yourself for a time. That’s why most folks don’t bother… but we’ll talk more about that tomorrow.